


A dream about you

by Llixale



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), Captain America - All Media Types, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: M/M, Misunderstandings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-26
Updated: 2017-11-07
Packaged: 2019-01-05 15:41:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 25,330
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12192795
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Llixale/pseuds/Llixale
Summary: Sometimes we make bad decisions but when the result is the life we’ve always dreamt of can we really complain? The problems arise when the dream decides to insert itself into reality. Sam will discover just how far he must go to get the man he loves.





	1. Almost perfect

**Author's Note:**

  * A translation of [Un pour moi, un pour toi](https://archiveofourown.org/works/12084354) by [Llixale](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Llixale/pseuds/Llixale). 



> It's all thanks to bretelgeuse, you can find here http://archiveofourown.org/users/bretelgeuse (thank you again for the traduction). Hope you'll like it.
> 
> Update : Initially I wanted to only trad my french fic but then...let's just say that he won't be the same. Sorry for the mistakes by the way.

Sam enters the white, anthracite bathroom. He had always dreamt of bathrooms like this, with a double sink and Italian showers. His is still occupied, but he goes in all the same with a welcome sigh of contentment. It’s spacious. There’s enough room to do anything shower and that’s the plan for the second round, here and now.

He runs his hand over his face while the water spreads around him in a mist, useless for correctly washing but that isn’t the goal. Under different circumstances he would move around like he was in the commercial singing Taaahiiiti, semi naked people around, thinking taking a shower in the middle of the wild is a good idea. The place makes him feel sexy and the look of his companion even more so.  
He drops down, kissing a path along Sam’s forehead, neck, stomach – this last one has Sam’s hands already in wet, almost brown hair. He feels the heat of the man’s mouth on his member, the slight licks of the tongue, a hand that comes to rest on his buttocks.

Sam could stay in that spot forever.

Only halfway through do they remember that they should hurry. Their guests will not be late and Sam has to make his famous punch before someone can pick up his recipe by discovering the secret ingredients.  
The back and forth goes faster, stronger, his partner moans, he’s pressed against the wall, legs spread, hair in his eyes and Sam can’t take it anymore - he bites the back of his neck. The muscle spasms under his fingers tell him that he’s not the only one who enjoyed it. They exchange a look, a smile, and hurry to finish inside the bathroom.

“Where’s Bucky?” Steve asks while carrying two beers; one for him, the other for Riley.  
“He’s coming,” responds Natasha, putting away her phone and turning her attention to the television, a celebrity game on the flat screen.  
Steve throws a look Sam’s way, the man wearing a long white and black patterned t-shirt and jeans. The outfit is completed by horrible but warm slippers. Steve had given them to him and Sam had made fun of him for a week, but every time Steve is over he wears them anyway.

A few knocks against the door announce the arrival of their last guest.

The man looks almost surprised when Steve lets him in and takes his coat. Sam walks up to him.  
“So that’s where you were?”  
Sam laughs softly while placing a glass of punch similar to champagne between his hands.  
“Where’d you want me to be? We have dinner every Thursday.”  
Bucky contemplates the scene before him. The apartment is bigger than Sam’s. Steve, Natasha, Luke, Misty, and Maria are there, as well as a blonde brick who vaguely tells him something.  
“So, not gonna say hello?” asks the brick while tapping his shoulder. This is what he finds strange because one, there is no metal and two, he doesn’t know why this man is so familiar.  
“Riley, let him breathe for two seconds. I swear, this guy,” Sam exasperates with a certain tenderness in his voice.  
“Baby, are we good for the quiche?” he goes on ahead without looking at anyone in particular as he rejoins Misty. Her top is sleeveless and Bucky can see that she also has two arms like before. He tries his best not to let any of his thoughts translate on his face. This is hard.  
“Yeah, I left it in the oven, it’s cooling down a bit,” Steve responds with a smile.  
What the fuck? Thinks Bucky, his eyes narrowing, still next to the door.  
“You okay, Buck?”  
“And you, Steve? Are you okay?” Bucky counters, hoping to see the end of this. He tastes the punch. This is some real bullshit, he thinks.  
“Yep, why? What could be wrong?”  
Bucky doesn’t respond. Instead he takes an even larger gulp this time and lets the alcohol run over his tongue and down his throat. He coughs. It’s nothing compared to Thor’s drinks but wow. Someone had fun with the dosage. It’s good, but it’s strong.

He spends most of the evening observing and his eyes nearly pop out of their sockets when he sees Steve unceremoniously kiss Sam while he’s serving drinks. No one seems phased by the sight and Bucky is positive that he’s fallen into the fourth dimension – if the return of his flesh and blood arm wasn’t already clue enough.  
He’s had enough. Bucky excuses himself and makes to leave, quickly and quietly, when Sam catches him at the door.  
“You and me, we’re going to have a little talk when you get back,” Bucky lashes out, not bothering to mask his annoyance.  
“What do you mean when I g--”  
“--Samuel Wilson, you know exactly what mean,” he warns as he departs, leaving Sam shocked and fixed to the same spot he was just in moments ago. Steve joins him, frowning.  
“You okay?”  
“I have to go,” Sam responds as he turns to face him. His brain almost shuts down. He was screwed; he was caught; he wasn’t careful enough. If Bucky ever tells someone about what he saw…  
Steve looks at him with a rare intensity and whispers to him:  
“I don’t like when you leave me.”  
Sam almost responds that he will return soon but the tone and tenure of the phrase makes him think twice. Does Steve know? The blonde’s hand comes to caress his jaw and he kisses him.  
“Sam… if you could have me… really…?”  
“I have you, here. What do you mean?” Sam asks, confused but soft, unable to mask his affection. He’s fixed by those blue eyes searching for a response. Steve turns towards the living room where the others don’t seem to cast them the least bit of attention.  
“If we could be together more often… would that make you happy?”  
Steve’s expression squeezes Sam’s heart. Somewhere, he thinks he should end it but he can’t hurt him, not Steve. He agrees. Steve smiles, obviously relieved.

Sam hurriedly arrives at the Avengers’ base. Forgotten are the gigantic towers; Tony Stark had decided to give them more human lodgings (he said). None of the buildings exceed five floors… on the surface. It may seem small but don’t let the exterior fool you, the underground was huge and could gt you lost.  
He heads towards the elevator when he hears the familiar voices of Steve and Sharon behind him. And shit. The ding of the elevator coincides with their arrival and he really can’t pretend to not have seen them. 

“Hey Sam,” Sharon smiles. The young woman looks genuinely happy to see him, he feels some guilt when she’s around, like h was betraying her. He doesn’t like that, that’s why he’s busying himself somewhere else. “We don’t see you around here too much these days.”  
“I never get to join you,” adds Steve. He looks Sam in the eyes. Steve likes looking people in the eye when he talks to them. But, all the same, Sam doesn’t like this look. He thanks God that Steve doesn’t have some kind of telepathy.  
“You know me, always here and there,” Sam jokes, but is cut short.  
“More “there” than “here”,” Steve says, not fooled.

Oops.

Sharon, sensing the discomfort, intervenes.  
“We were wanting to have a little dinner tomorrow, Misty will be there, she’s going to see Tony about her arm and we thought it would be nice if you came too.” She blushes.  
Sam’s eyebrows are on the verge of fly to the moon the higher they climb up his skull. Are these two serious? His gaze passes from one to the other then from the other to one. A dinner? With Steve and Sharon? What about Misty? Let’s be clear – Sam loves Misty, the woman is great but… no thanks. Not that way. Is it a double date? It’s a double date! Sam refuses, and that’s exactly what comes out of his mouth… pretty much:  
“Great! Tell me where and when, I’ll be there.” He pulls himself to the elevator door, a forced smile on his face and a finger on what he hopes to be the right floor. On the ground floor, Steve does nothing to hide his confusion.

“That was weird, right? Where did all that come from?  
“He’s… yeah,” agrees the young woman, clearly perplexed. “What did you do, Steve?”  
“Me? Nothing at all!” he responds, scandalized. She is not impressed.  
“Our plan is perfect, if he comes tomorrow, it’s in the bag.”  
The two Machiavels exchange a look. The plan is infallible, if they can get Sam in the same spot more than five minutes.


	2. What you shouldn't do

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is the part where things starts to diverge from the other fic. Hope you'll like it.

Sam can feel his heart pounding as he arrives on the floor Bucky Barnes lives. His brain can’t formulate coherent thoughts but one thing is sure, he MUST see Bucky.

He opens the door without thinking that it might be closed. He knows the man is waiting for him here. The only light comes from outside through the windows. Bucky must have set them like that because usually, they’re totally opaque. He is sitting on the black sofa, clearly waiting for him. Sam closes the door behind him push himself in taking smalls steps to get closer, stops after three of them.

“If I ask you not to talk about what you see, would you do it?” he asked, not believing in it himself.

“No.”

“Come on Bucky, you can’t do this to me, you know you shouldn’t have seen this. This is mine, you hates when Wanda has to go into your head, you did the same thing!” Sam plead.

“No, it’s not. You don’t see your friends anymore, you aren’t focused when you’re on missions, you are easily irritated and you definitely did lie to people about what you’re doing sometimes. Not only that, but you are using that thing, which was built thanks to the Framework and let it read your mind. Did you thought for one second that it could have uses the information you gave them or mess with your memory?”

Bucky is disappointed, but it doesn’t stops Sam.

“This is not your business Bucky, ok? You won’t talk about it, ever, because it is not your damn business.”

Sam is angry and if Bucky doesn’t shut his mouth, he will have to find a way to do it for him “wow, easy there, calm down”, he thinks, putting his hands on his hips.

“You know this is not safe, you read the files Sam, are you waiting to wake up in the middle of nowhere to understand? To disappear?”

“I can handle myself, thank you. Are we clear?”

“Absolutely not, are you insane? You are using a device that was built by someone crazy only to fuck Steve in your dream and you have the nerves to…”

Sam is in front of him in seconds, his hand grapping Bucky.

“I told you to just your mouth Bucky, don’t try me, you know nothing”

His gaze drops to Sam’s hands, remove them, then he looks at his eyes.

“Look at you Sam, look at you. You are not yourself, I am sorry but I have to…urgghh !”

Bucky drops onto the floor, convulsing. Sam put back the electrical gloves (thank you mister Stark) and run to his own place.

 

He really doesn’t have a lot of time, he runs and drive, once inside, he takes the device, a rectangular box who looks like a particularly fancy mainframe, and the big and shiny helmet.  
He doesn’t know how Bucky got in and he doesn’t feel the need to. All he has to do is to put all that somewhere nobody will find it. His place outside the Tower? Nah, to obvious, he needs somewhere safe. Well, he can go back to where he find it after all, the owner is dead now. It will buy him time.

 

He got two missed call. One from Steve and one from Bucky. A text too “You will pay this, I’ll transform you in nuggets”. Welp, he will beg for mercy later.

 

Sam come back to the Tower like there’s absolutely no problem three days later and just say he was a little ill and wasn’t feeling so fresh, even right in front of Bucky who send him a murderous glare.

“You missed the diner” says Steve casually after a meeting.

“Oh, right, the diner!” remember Sam without feigning his surprise, he quickly add in his head “the diner I had no intention showing up in the first place anyway?”, he needs to chill.

Steve looks at him without any emotion showing on his face which kind of makes him uncomfortable. It’s like he’s reading into your soul or something like that.

“I hope you had a great time, I bet Sharon’s lasagna were delicious.”

“Yeah they were but, it was not the same without you.” add Steve as if he was stating facts. “Maybe we can go grab a drink tonight, Sharon will be here, Misty too I think, maybe Bucky.  
Said Bucky comes to stand right next to his best friend, a predatory smile on his face.

“Yeah Sam, come with us tonight it’s been a while. I assure you, the night will be electrifying”.

Sam hears loud and clear the subtext and does his best to act innocent.

“Yeah, it’ll be great, text me the hour and place later, ok, bye.”

He is already outside when Steve asks Bucky:

“He is weird lately no? Like…he is here but tries to disappear as soon as possible.

Bucky really, really, reaaaallly wants to put Sam on blast, only to get back at him for the stunt he had put last night. He decides to give him a few days to get his shit together.

“Well, we’ll see tonight. Falcons are strange animals after all”.

 

It’s almost eight pm and Sam should go to the bar meet the others, instead, here he is turning left, getting closer and closer from the house he hides the device in.

 

Nobody is here, as it should.

 

He will be late, but he can…he can just use it a little, just to see him, right? His fingers are shaking a little by the time he finish the installation. The need to log in would scares him if he didn’t get to be with him. Deep down, he knows something isn’t right but as he puts the helmet on and a now familiar sensation of falling takes him, he doesn’t care.

 

_He wakes up on a beach, the first thing he sees is Riley, running after Natasha to try to catch her. On his right, Misty is laying of her back, big round brown sunglasses, a black scarf around her hair. She seems to be sleeping._

 

_“On your left”, says Steve siting down next to him, white tank top and red swim trunks. “I missed you”._

_“I missed you too” says Sam easily._

_He wonders how the others in this reality…no, in this dream, kind of, perceive his apparitions. Do they realizes? His questions vanishes when Steve put a reddish cocktail in his hand._

_“No alcohol in it, fresh fruits only”._

_Sam kisses him thank you and take a sip, enjoying the view and the company. He runs, he plays, he swim, the sun goes down in the blink of an eye it seems._

_“I have to go” he admits, even if he really can’t say how much time passes in the other real...”the only reality Wilson”, he forces himself to remember. Being here starts to messes him up, the way he perceives time is weirder by the day._

_“Do you?” asks Steve, seriously._

_“What do you mean? You know I have…stuff to do…elsewhere”._

_Suddenly, they’re alone on the beach, waves are a little calmer._

_“I know exactly where you’re going when you left me Sam, remember, I know everything you know. You don’t need to go there, you could stay here with us, with me. “_

_Sam is speechless, he doesn’t want to be here forever, does he? No, it wouldn't work._

_“I can’t, people are counting on me, come on, you know I can’t.”_

_He can see a sadness in Steve’s face he is not used to._

_“Sorry, it’s just…you’re real and sometimes I forget, well, more like I want to forget it. I want to feel like I can always be with you. Here or there.”_

_“I can’t be here always, he would be much easier if I could transplant you back with me” he jokes. It’s not funny, but he doesn’t know what to say._

_“Would you want that? For me to be with you? We wouldn’t have to use this. It would be nice”._

_He knows Steve is hurt. He has an impulse to give him the world and agrees, laying his head on Steve shoulder._

_“Yeah, I’d love that.”_


	3. I should have known better

“Somebody thought it would be fun to develop a game with the Framework system, now we have people doing things they shouldn’t do because they kind of are controlled by it.” Maria said. “We think they’re looking for something, we don’t know what”

After that, Sam couldn’t listen, it was like the sound didn’t registered in his brain. He knew from the start that this “game” wasn’t good. He was stupid to test it and yet, here he is, in a meeting solidifying it as a threat. Everyone has something to say, except Bucky. Bucky is drilling holes into Sam’s head right now and the guy can’t fault him. He is in a room with super soldiers and spies and people who can read in your mind and he is here, in the middle, trying to keep his calm when he could have woken up god knows where doing god knows what.  
As the meeting finish, he tries his best to be as discreet as possible, doesn’t rush to be out of the room but clearly avoiding Bucky. He has to say sorry, ask for forgiveness because he knows the ex-Winter Soldier will come for his head and the more he waits, the angrier he will be. He just doesn’t have the words for it right now. Instead, he will talk to the other Steve, he has to know what’s happening. But what if he is going back and get stuck? Or if he is the one being possessed? No, he definitely can’t take that risk. He doesn’t have much of a choice here if he doesn’t want to come clean right now.

Because they have three little towers instead of the huge one, Sam was surprised to find Steve and Bucky right in front of him when he got out of the elevator to the floor he shared with Steve. They could have been everywhere, but no, the universe couldn’t give him this. All he wanted was a little time to compose himself. He could have swear he saw them go in the opposite direction. He didn’t talk to them during the meeting so he pretends to look for something in his phone when he passes them with a little “Hi”.

“Sam?”

“Lord help me” thinks Sam, turning to face Steve and Bucky. He tries to relax a little.

“Yeah?”

“We were supposed to see you last night” starts Steve with a shy smile.

“Yeah, I am sorry, I…I got busy.”

“Doing what?” asks Bucky crossing his arms, hostility in his voice, which earn him a questioning glare from his best friend.

“Ok, ok, calm down Sam, you got this. You can turn this to your advantage” he thinks.

“Well, Bucky, about that, can I talk to you? Alone?”

“Oh, but certainly dear, let’s go to your place, shall we?”

He takes Sam’s arm leaving a puzzled Steve without a word. He follows them with his eyes and decides that he would talk to Sam later, his bullshit-o-meter is tingling.

The door is closed, Sam against it, a metal arm close to his face and a very pissed James Barnes looking right into his eyes, into is soul, into his very existence.

“Talk, now” he growls.

“Ok, first of all, I am very, very sorry about last time, I need your help.”

“Wilson…” warns Bucky, one inch closer.

“Please, Bucky, please, I need to understand what’s going on, I think Steve can help us, he…”

“Steve? This is NOT Steve, Sam. Do you understand? This is a not a person, are you kidding me?”

Sam tries his hardest to keep his look on Bucky’s eyes, he won’t take the risk of doing this alone. He needs to find a way to convince him.

“I know this is not him, believe me, I can’t forget.”

“So why are you doing this? What you did to me was not okay, you were supposed to be better than this.”

He can’t look at Bucky for three seconds. He already knew that he deceived him, but to face it like that was something else and he needed to take responsibility. He needs to show resolution and locks once again their eyes.

“I know, I am truly sorry. I know I sound crazy to you right now but please, all I need is for you to watch me while I go back one last time. That’s all. I just need someone to make sure I don’t do something weird. I go, ask if he knows things and get out.”

“Ok”

“Ok?” 

Sam feels like his body is lighter than before, so much than he can’t stops himself when he wraps his arms around Bucky's neck saying “thank you” several times. Well, at least, until Bucky speaks again:

“But you have to tell Steve about all this, you have to come clean. And I’m gonna destroy this thing. Are we good?”

“Bucky, please…”

“Are.We.Good?”

Sam knows. He knows that if he doesn’t agree, Bucky will find Steve and he won’t be pretty. His heart is in his throat and his hands are shaking on Bucky’s shirt. He doesn’t remember putting his hands here and is kind of surprised to still have them considering the not that friendly relationship between them. There is nowhere to go.

“Ok Buck. We will do it your way”.

 

The closer he is from the house, the stronger his need to use the device gets. He wanted it before, sure, but right now it’s like an addiction, as if he physically needed it. “It’s weird” he thinks. But, once again, he knew from the start this thing wasn’t good for him. 

The street isn’t dark yet, some people are out, minding their own business. Nothing is out of the ordinary but Sam think a little too late that it doesn’t mean this neighborhood is anywhere near good. A lot of fuckery can be hide behind a polite smile. Nothing make the house stood out from the other. All in a variation of crème, beige and light brown. The kind of environment to settle in life and maybe starts a family. 

He comes in like he owns the place and wait for Bucky by the little garden in the back. The man appears in all black except for his navy hoody. Sam knows they’re a lot of weapons hiding in there, he can almost hear the *cling cling* of them as the man walks to him.

“Ready?”

Is he ready? No, not really but having Bucky with him brings a little more courage, even if it’s just to avoid seeming weak in front of him. Ok, maybe it’s because the guy is tough and sometimes friendly but don’t quote him on this.

He nods and guide him upstairs to the second room on the left. The walls are in a light grey, a desk with all the material is next to the only window. The helmet is waiting for him in the exact same place he left it. He quickly turn on the computer, a hi tech machine glowing with red neon from inside. 

Bucky look at him shaking his head.

“You are way to proficient at this. You sure did use it a lot of time.”

Sam stops for a moment, turn his head as if to look at the other man then put the helmet on without answering. 

 

He wake up in his bedroom, which is weird because “their bedroom” isn’t like his. Steve is in a corner, head between his legs.

“Steve?” asks tentatively Sam, getting closer.

“Sam ? Oh, Sam, I thought I wouldn’t be able to see you again.” Steve stand and meet Sam halfway, hugging him.

“What’s going on?” 

“This world is getting destroyed, there’s not much left, look.” Steve says showing the windows.

It’s dark outside, which isn’t weird in itself. But there is no light, no sound. Nothing. When Sam get closer he can see that it’s like the neighborhood was eaten by the darkness. He steps back, shock on his face.

“Why? What the hell ?”

“Well, I think the Shield caught the last of the creator, he probably put a virus to destroy this place.

Sam passes his hand in his short hair, trying to think fast.

“What about you?”

Steve’s eyes drops. 

“I am going to disappear I think.”

“No…no, no I need more time, please, there has to be a way, we can do something for you to survive, just a little longer” says Sam, and he doesn’t know if it’s to Steve or to himself.

“Do you really want that? Us being together a little longer?”

“What do you…yeah, of course that’s what I want” and Sam forgets all about the question he was here to ask in the first place because Steve kisses him gently then say :

“I can do that, if you allow me. Do you allow me to do what it takes to be with you just a little more?”

“Yes” answers Sam with a desperation he can’t control. 

Then, the shadow come closer to Steve and put his black hands on him. Sam tries to free him but the more he tries to protect Steve, the more the Shadow solidifies until it has a vague human shape.

Then he attacks. 

Sam fight with more ferocity than he is used to, but he can’t give up now. Steve is sitting on the bed saying things Sam can't quite understand like he is praying.

“What are you doing?” he asks dodging a high kick. “I may need a little help here”

“60%, 62%...”

No prayers then.

He falls, the shadowy man on top of him. Punch his side tilt backward to free himself.

“86%, 88%”

“STEVE!” Sam shouts still fighting and slowly but surely, loosing. 

He will fail. He will fail and loose Steve, maybe he will die here. He jumps on the shadow, try to get him nowhere near Steve but his back meets the wall and the choc cut his breath.   
“99%, complete”.

Suddenly, Steve isn’t there anymore and Sam doesn’t know if his a good or a bad thing. All he knows is that right before a punch hits him in the face, the shadowy man disappears. Instead, something made by light catches his hand.

“It’s me” it says. 

Steve?

He knows it’s Steve, one way or another. The man guides him outside and there’s only darkness. He has a weird sensation, as if he were being in two place at the same time. He wonders if his body is being possessed at this very moment. “Is this what they felt?” he wonders, the thought of sleepwalking while being lost in the darkness isn’t a comforting one.   
He can fell his body running, then sitting in something, a car? It’s like being blindfolded and taking somewhere to a secret rendezvous except it feels like an abduction and he can’t get out of the helmet. 

“Just a few minutes Sam, you will be okay, I promise.”

And yeah, this is Steve’s voice, but that makes no sense. So he goes with the flow, waiting for a moment he can take advantage of. 

 

Finally, after some times, maybe twenty minutes? He can't really tell at that point, he is placed on something soft, “a bed” he thinks.

“Sam, I need you not to freak out okay?”

“I am already freaking out, what’s going on? Take this thing off me! Who the fuck are you?”

Then he hears the click of the helmet being removed.

“You know who I am” says a Steve with a shy smile.

Eyes ready to pop, Sam look at Steve, then his bedroom, because it seems that this is where they are, then Steve again. 

“What are you?” he asks, shaking a little, fear and excitation mixing inside of him.

“A LMD”.

Sam sights.

“You got to be kidding me…”

“I didn’t have a lot of options here Sam you know? I can tell you don’t trust them, me.”

“Of course I don’t, come on! You know this is fucked up, Are you evil? Tell me now if you are evil.”

Steve rolls his eyes.

“No, I am not, well, I don’t feel like it but I guess there’s one or two things you are not going to like.”

Sam takes the time to look at LMD Steve, everything is the same as the other Steve and he can’t calm himself. This is too much.

“Like what?” he asks, getting mentally ready to jump on him and try to escape. He doesn’t trust one bit this thing…person…thing? He doesn’t know.

Steve seems ready to talk but something catches his attention outside.

“They’re coming” he says, calm.

“Who?” asks Sam not feeling so fresh right now.

“Bucky, and Steve.”

Sam starts to say "How do you know ?" then“no” again and again, pacing in his room, his mind is unable to plan something, he is doomed, he is fucked, there’s no point in escaping.

“Oh my god, well, we are both going to die. My mama told me, don’t follow white guys, but noooo, I needed to find the whitest bread possible and I am gonna die here. How did this happened?"

“Maybe I should tell you now that the shadow you fought? That was Bucky in real life, I hit him in the head to take you and run. I didn’t know where to go easily so…” add Steve quickly, face a little red.

Sam cannot believe it. His mouth is gaping, and when the bedroom door opens on a very surprised Steve and a very, VERY furious James Barnes, a single tear drops down.

“Oh shit” he barely manages to say.


	4. What do all goods things come to an end ?

In seconds, Steve (the official one) is shielding Sam while the person (?) who is also wearing his face is pinned against the wall, a metal arm against his throat. Steve’s mind is racing. A metamorph? A spell? A clone? _Whatever this is, it can’t be good_. He checks Sam for injuries, he can see some bruises forming. He had a fight.

 

“Who are you?” he asks the man half hidden by Bucky.

 

“I am Steve Rogers” he answers simply.

 

“No, you’re not” the tone is cold, two seconds away from fighting him.

 

“Well, sort of, I am his Steve Rogers” chuckle the man with confidence, turning his eyes on Sam with a shy smile.

 

_What does he mean “his” Steve Rogers?_ He wonders. The other man doesn’t move, he is calm and doesn’t seems to considerate being in a problematic situation here. Bucky didn’t tell anything besides “Sam needs help” when he called him. Lucky for them, he was nearby.

He doesn’t know what he was expecting but being face to face with his doppelganger isn’t high on his list.

 

“We should kill him right now” proposes Bucky.”Let’s not repeat errors done by some of us in the past”.

 

“No, please, you can’t!” almost shout Sam.

 

Was that concern all over his face?

 

“Do you know him?” asks Steve to him, not missing the way Sam tenses at the question.

 

There’s a bit of silence, Sam looking at the other Steve, Bucky turning his head to have a better look at them both.

 

“Oh my god, oh my god, I see what is happening here!” realizes Bucky, pure shock on his face. Letting totally go of the other Steve to practically jump right in front of Sam and grab him by the collar. “You fucker! How the hell did you bring him here?”

 

“Bucky, stop!” commands Steve, trying to break them.

 

“I told you to destroy that thing and you bring HIM here?” continues to shout Bucky, anger and disgusts dripping in each words.

 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t know, I…” Sam looks so lost right now and Bucky so angry that it seems to Steve that this situation is Sam doing. _But it can’t be right?_

 

“You are a filthy liar Sam Wilson. I am done with your shit, you better explain yourself now!” advises Bucky, letting know clearly that this is a threat.

 

Steve is used to the two of them bickering but this is way too serious.

 

“Sam, please, what’s going on?” he asks the man firmly, keeping his eyes on the other Steve.

 

Sam doesn’t say anything during two painfully long minutes, looking at the three of them several time until he takes a deep breath, closes his eyes, open them then starts talking.

 

“This is the version of Steve I created by using the Interface. A virus destroyed it and somehow, he founded an LMD to put himself into”

 

“Well, the administrator was trying to transfer his mind into this body but since you arrested him, I saw an opportunity” adds LMD-Steve.

 

“I don’t call an AI replicating me an “opportunity”, I call that a problem” responds Steve immediately.

 

“Oh, don’t worry, this body is only one of the earliest version so, it only gonna last five to seven days at most” LMD-Steve could announce the weather with that tone. He doesn’t seems phased by the info. Sam on the other hand…

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“Well, just a little longer remember? I couldn’t totally escape the virus so I am stuck inside and I will basically die next week. No need to look at me like that, I don’t care. I am only here for you anyway.”

 

“This is so wrong” mumble Bucky shaking his head.

 

Steve is intrigued by Bucky strong reaction. _Why is he so mad?_ But more importantly, Sam created a version of him? _Why would he do that?_

 

“I am sorry about earlier Bucky” starts LMD-Steve, “You were trying to disconnect Sam but it would have basically prevented his mind from coming back. And I thought you wouldn’t react well to me”

 

“You almost cracked my head open, I don’t accept your apologies” spits Bucky, he then turn to face Sam hands on his hips instead of on his collar, eyebrows raised, clearly waiting something. By the look Sam throw Steve, there's more to the story that he previously believed.

 

“Please Bucky don’t…”pleas Sam in distress, eyes watering.

 

_What the hell is going on here?_

 

“Tell him, the whole story, you promised Sam, one way or another I’ll make you keep your promise, don’t try that shit with me pal.”

 

“Fuck you Barnes” growls Sam. He doesn’t look at him or Steve when he confesses “I didn’t use the Interface in link with the case, I did it because I wanted to know what my dream life was. I wanted a taste…”

 

“And what a taste, you got yourself a boyfriend!” hissed Bucky definitely more in the know that Steve thought.

 

“A what now?” Steve asks, believing to have misunderstood something.

 

“Hi, I am Steve Rogers, Sam’s dream boyfriend, nice to meet ya” introduces LMD-Steve, hand ready to shake Steve’s.

 

Slowly, really slowly, Steve turns himself and stands in front of Sam until the man have nowhere to look but his eyes. He doesn’t say anything, he hopes that this isn’t true but Sam insistence on looking the floor is clear.

This is real.

It’s a slap in his face. Anger is rushing through his veins. Without a word, he leaves the bedroom, leaves the apartment. Right now, he can’t think about Samuel Wilson but somehow, he is all he can think about at the same time.

* * *

 

 

Not long after that, Bucky left too, wishing Sam to be killed in his sleep by LMD-Steve, which was rude but not totally unfair he guesses.

 

“What did I do” was saying Sam crying against the wall trying to pinpoint the moment he lost his good judgement.

 

He needed some space and LMD-Steve proposed to take the couch tonight and that he wanted Sam to feel safer. At that very moment, Sam felt like if something bad happened to him, it would have been his fault anyway so why bother? One more bad decision, one! He couldn’t sleep at first, when finally his mind decided to let him have some rest, the sun was already visible. He woke up tears on his cheeks, guilt written everywhere on his body. _Nice job Sam, nice job_.

LMD-Steve was waiting for him to come out. He didn’t say anything, just hugged him and maybe Sam did feel better, but a part of him was screaming. It was real. He did that.

The first day, they didn’t say much. LMD-Steve trying to give him some space, which was odd because Sam apartment isn’t that big in the first place. He was grateful and decided to not look at his phone before the next day. It was seven o’clock when he decided that he couldn’t avoid the entire world more without risking someone to drop by his place unannounced. He got one missed call from Natasha, and a text from Bucky.

He calls Natasha first.

 

“Hi, did you need something? He asks as soon as she answers.

 

“Samuel Wilson, what a surprise.”

 

“Oh…Nat…”

 

he gulped, feeling that she knows everything already.

 

“You will not believe where I am”

 

“Where?” asks Sam, falling into the trap head first, too happy to think his fears were baseless, she could be on a mission, drinking coconut water in some exotic place.

 

***knock knock knock***

He frowns, comes to the door and opens it to find the very same Natasha he is on the phone with.

 

“Someone told me a really funny story. Really, like…unbelievable. Do you want to hear it? She says in lieu of salutation”

 

“If I say no, will you not talk about it?”

 

“No”

 

“Then suit yourself” he mumbles, LMD Steve sitting on the floor, looking at them with interest. While he closed behind her. She stops when her eyes sees the not-real-Steve then drops on the couch like she’s at home.

 

“So, this is the story of a boy who should have known better and did something so stupid that not one but two super soldiers are furious because of him”

 

“I know Nat…”

 

“I don’t think you do. I really don’t. This is some Stark level of misjudgment." she cuts, eyes piercing.

 

“He didn’t know I would take this body” tries LMD-Steve to soften the blow but dream Natasha or real Natasha are both threatening so he doesn’t try that hard, not wanting to be killed on sight.

 

“Sam, it would be lovely if I had a black bubble tea. Tall, you can choose the topping”

 

“I don’t have that, where do you think you are? I have orange juice if you…” starts Sam surprised by the request.

 

“I said”, she repeats a little louder, «it would be lovely if I had a black bubble tea, cold of course”. Then he understands, _she wants to be alone with LMD-Steve_.

The two share a look and he can see him gulp, clearly not that comfortable. Sam has the feeling that if he denies her what she asks, they’re will be LMD blood or whatever is in inside on the couch. He loves the couch.

 

“Ok, I’ll go now” is all he can say before letting them alone.

 

He can’t help but notice the five or six agents posted around as he goes. She has back up. Because bubble tea isn’t exactly a common delicacy around there and he knows where Natasha loves to buy hers, it takes a little less than one hour for him to return. He is pleased to see that the couch his fine. LMD-Steve too. Natasha takes her tea, sip it and makes an appreciative noise.

 

“This is the kind of things I could see Stark, Scott or even Peter do, but you Sam, tss tss tss, I am surprised. I wouldn’t have pegged you for the human sex toy type”

 

“He is not a sex toy! Come on Nat, do you really believe I enjoy the situation?”

 

She smiles, more to herself than to Sam. LMD-Steve comes back from the kitchen, drinking some water.

 

“So, I understand he isn’t supposed to last long. What if this is not true?”

 

“Then you can kill me yourself” respond LMD-Steve without missing a beat.

 

“Oh, I like that” she laughed. “Well, we have everything we need about the case and I put a tracker on him so, he can’t escape. You know Maria don’t believe it? She thinks someone is lying about this, she will own me fifty bucks thanks to you”

 

Sam can’t help but asks “Everybody know?”

 

“Everybody know, when I am telling you that Steve and Bucky are furious, they are. I don’t know if you should go talk to them asap or disappear in another country at that point. I thinks Barnes put your picture on a dummy this morning. He claims his aim his better when he got someone he hates in front of him.”

 

Sam don’t know if Natasha is amused by the situation or not but when he feels a sharp pain in his arm, he can see her smiles as she put some kind of syringe in her backpack.

 

“What was that?” he asks scandalized.

 

“Well, we can risk him running around unsupervised so he is your responsibility. You will have to be in a twenty yards radius from each other’s. We will have a notification if you aren’t and one of you will end up shot so…take care”

 

Sam doesn’t have the time to register the information before she’s gone, leaving the two of them alone.

* * *

 

 

Time goes by in the blink of an eye. The first three days is dedicated to make LMD-Steve experience human things himself. He eats, he drives, he swim, pet dogs in the park and he seems happy. Sam ease into the program and by day four, he is comfortable with him. The relationship isn’t the same as it was in the Interface. First of all, they don’t sleep together. In fact, Sam can’t bring himself to be too affectionate. They will sit next to each other, joke and everything, but something his holding him back. He can admit, if only to himself that he feels bad for Steve in a certain way.

The same day, he has to finish his report, unfortunately, he needs to go consult some files and doesn’t have a choice in bringing LMD-Steve with him at the Towers. He was on edge, looking over his shoulders so much that LMD-Steve starts to ask him if he was okay. People knew at least enough of the story to make double check when they saw LMD-Steve but didn’t comment or asked questions. They were next to the Archives, his hearts starts to calm down, feeling relief once inside. Neither Steve nor Bucky were fond of paperwork so it was highly unlikely to find them here. And he was right, he didn’t met the two. But he met somebody else while exiting the little building.

_Sharon._

 

“Hey Sam, how are you?” She genuinely asked when she spotted him.

 

Wherever she was going could wait it seems.

 

“I’m…good, umh and you?” he tries not to sound too weird but fails.

 

“Same, same”. She was smiling softly, Sam didn’t understand what she wanted or was waiting for until he heard LMD-Steve from behind.

 

“Hi Sharon, I’m Steve, nice to meet you” introduces LMD-Steve. “You know, we didn’t had the occasion on seeing you that much in the Interface but you are even more beautiful than in Sam’s mind”

 

Sam feels like he could implode.

 

“Wow, this is…umh…surprising. I mean, meeting you not…umh thank you” she giggled, blushing a little.

 

“You’re welcome. Hey, I have an idea…oh oh” LMD-Steve says while looking at something behind her.

 

They all look in the same direction, seeing a very locked-jaw Steve Rogers coming on us. Impact in three, two, one…

 

“Are you okay?” he asked her, eyeing both Sam and LMD-Steve suspiciously.

 

“Why wouldn’t I be?”

 

“Hey Steve, I was just about to suggest Sharon to come with Sam and I tonight in that bar…umh, what’s the name again?” LMD-Steve turns to Sam, all smile and hand on his shoulder so Sam responds automatically without thinking for one second that Sharon or Steve would say yes:

 

“The Green Medal”

 

Sam can see Steve’s attention on him, then on the hand, then on him again.

 

“Sure, this week has been a little challenging, I think we could all use a drink but, can you drink Steve? I mean, other Steve”

 

“Well, this body is a wonder, It can make me process alcohol like a human for as long as I want”

 

“Wow, will you tell us all your secrets when you’re drunk?” She asks, way to happily.

 

“Maybe”, he says with a wink.

 

Was LMD-Steve flirting with Sharon? “ _Oh hell no_ ” thought Sam. _“You already have one of them, how is that possible?”_

 

“I am not letting you alone with him” snaps Steve, earning him a look from Sharon.

 

“I mean, I’ll be here too” grumble Sam, not looking at him.

 

“Well, you’re not exactly a beacon of good judgement recently so, like I said, I’ll be here”

 

The tension escalated quickly as the two of them were now looking into each other’s eyes. Sam replied nothing, but insults were dancing in his eyes, even if Steve was right, he didn’t need to call him out like that. He wanted to take back the invitation that he didn’t give in the first place.

 

“You can come, it could be fun” proposed LMD-Steve with just a little bit of “something” Sam couldn’t quite place.

 

“Fine” hisses Steve with no joy whatsoever.

 

“Cool” smile LMD-Steve carefree.

 

“Awesome” adds Sharon.

 

“I can’t wait” say Sam mimicking Steve's tone, already taking LMD-Steve by the arm to move away from the two blonds.

He waits until they’re out of sight. “What was that? Are you crazy?”

 

“Come on Sam, you don’t want to fight with Steve that long, we both know it. So why don’t we all calm down a little and use this opportunity to make peace?”

 

Sam was looking at him like he suddenly was speaking Spanish.

 

“You were practically flirting with his girlfriend, why did you do that? Do you have a death wish?”

 

“I was just being nice, besides, the only one I want to flirt with is you” he murmurs, brushing Sam’s hip with a finger without going further than that.

 

“Y-Yeah, well, I don’t…have anything to say then”

 

It was true, he didn’t.

 

LMD-Steve knew him, and he was right. He needed to make peace with Steve…or maybe he could do like any normal adult and ignore the fuck outta him.

 

“Sam, listen…this situation isn’t ideal, we know what we did and most importantly, why. But he doesn’t. You have to keep that in mind.”

 

“You make too much sense, that’s not what I want” whined Sam, pouting.

 

“But that’s what you need, besides, I want to talk to him. I think we could both learn from it”

 

Sam was shaking his head, surprised.

 

“You? You wanna talk to Steve? Why?”

 

“Steve’s business” he answers mysteriously with a grin.

 

Sam isn’t sold on that but he stays quiet for now.

* * *

 

 

The level of awkwardness at the table they share is crazy is Sam’s opinion. LMD-Steve is next to him, Sharon in the front and next to her, Steve looking like he needs only the tiniest of excuse to throw his fist. Sam looks at his red wine as if it was telling him the secret to all of his questions. Maybe he could just have his body here and his mind elsewhere, somewhere not under the enormous elephant in the room. Because they were in some sort of little nest, very cozy, kind of isolating each group of client, the privacy made difficult to not at the very least, exchange small talks while LMD-Steve put his hand on his shoulder to comfort him.

 

“So, Sam, you seems pretty busy…”started Sharon before being interrupted by Steve grumbling:

 

“Busy lying to his friends you mean”

 

Sam stopped playing with his straw, looking at Steve surprised that he went for the jugular so quickly.

 

“Ok, we can start this in a better way don’t you think?” sights LMD-Steve looking at the two men with hope.

 

Sam decides to ignore Steve and as the conversation went by, he knows the man doesn’t like it one bit but it actually amuses him. He can be petty too after all. If he sit closer to LMD Steve or take a sip of his drink, who can blame him? Sharon and LMD-Steve talks and laugh and it’s clear that the bad mood emanates from one person specifically. Sam takes pleasure in participating with them, which is easier when he doesn’t acknowledge the blond throwing daggers with his eyes on the table opposite.

 

“I’m going to the bathroom” announces LMD-Steve already up after dropping a quick kiss to Sam’s cheeks.

 

“Me too” adds Steve going in the same direction.

 

“Uh, does he really need to use the bathroom?” asks Sharon half smiling.

 

“Well, I’m sure he could but just in case, let’s be ready to run if things go south” jokes Sam nervously.

* * *

 

 

LMD-Steve is washing his hand when Steve enters, blocking the door with his body by leaning into it in a way that tries to be casual but they know it isn’t. LMD-Steve wait for the other man to speak.

 

“Stop that, what you are doing with Sam, stop it.” Orders Steve with his best Captain America voice.

 

LMD-Steve tilt his head, then smile.

 

“Why would I do that? It makes him happy.”

 

“I don’t believe that”

 

“Well, that’s on you” starts LMD-Steve, “I wanted to know how someone like you couldn’t love Sam. The guy is funny, has a heart of gold, is brave and is gorgeous. Did you know the Interface doesn’t give you the one you want but the one you need based of the information the user have? Some people are so pissed when they discover they don’t know themselves as much as they thought.”

 

“Why are you telling me this”? Asks Steve.

 

“He was so surprised when I made a move on him” continues LMD-Steve “He thought the Interface was broken at first” he laughs. "You should have seen his face" He looks pensive for a moment, not looking at anything. “A part of me doesn’t want to leave him.

 

“Too bad you only have a few days left then. Maybe things will go back the way they were once you’re gone” spits Steve. But the second the words are out of his mouth, he feel ashamed.

 

“Or maybe I’ll find a way to always be by his side, he deserves better than you” snaps LMD-Steve with a bit of anger.

 

Steve pins him against the wall, next to the dryer. “Say that again?” he asks just when the door opens on Sam, looking at the two of them disappointed.

 

“Oh men, I knew you couldn’t behave. Let’s go Steve, I mean…my..my Steve” he tries, blush showing even on his dark skin.

 

LMD-Steve makes Steve let him go,j beaming, then go to Sam who checks him quickly.

 

“Are you okay?” he asks putting his hand on his forehead as if he could develop bumps then looking at each side of his face to see if he was hit. LMD-Steve was aware of the murderous glare Steve was sending him so he did the only logical action and drops a quick peck on Sam lips.

You can definitely see him blushing.

 

“Ok babe, let’s go”

 

* * *

 

 

The last two days, Sam didn’t heard of Steve or Bucky. He didn’t want to deal with them anyway. When LMD-Steve tell him this is his last night, Sam knew it was coming but still feels his heart in his throat. Natasha comes by, explaining that someone will come collect the body and that ultimately, it will be destroyed. LMD-Steve makes Sam promises to not go see that.

As they lay in Sam bed, Sam’s head on LMD-Steve chest, listening to the artificial heartbeat, he realizes that it’s not just an AI dying, it’s his dream. Maybe it’s not fair, maybe it’s plain stupid but he wishes his feeling for Steve would die with the LMD.

They talk about everything and nothing. LMD-Steve gently stroking Sam’s hair. They doesn’t know what time it is, they doesn’t care, really, Sam can’t find sleep, not until LMD-Steve murmurs "Love you Sam” before shutting down. It’s only then he allows himself to cry until his body gives up in a heavy dream-less sleep.

* * *

 

 

Sam remembers vaguely not having locked the door of his apartment in the tower. What was the point when he knew somebody was coming to take LMD-Steve? So when he hears soft noises in the living room, he doesn’t move and just wait. They’re at least two from what he can musters, hushed conversation as if they were hesitating. Well, if they didn’t want to come, it wasn’t his problem. Finally, two soft knocks on his door were made and whoever it was made their entrance. Sam wasn’t facing them, curled up against LMD-Steve body.

 

“Sam?” asks Steve, and it’s like cold water on his skin.

He turn and get up to face them, eyes red from the lack of sleep and ugly crying. He is with Bucky. Of course Bucky his here. “We came to…”

 

Sam laugh bitterly.

 

“Of course they sent you two, what a joke”

 

“Come on Steve, let’s get this over with” insists Bucky, getting closer until Sam is in front of him, pushing him back.

 

“No, you are not touching him, you can both get out, I’ll take care of it myself” almost shout Sam.

 

Bucky is apparently having none of it as he takes Sam arm, put something that look like a syringe except for the suctioning end part and clicks on a button. The tracker is out of the now bleeding Sam arm who hisses and tries to punch Bucky who dodge without looking at him and puts the tracker in a little plastic bag.

 

“YOU PSYCHO!” he screams.

 

“Shut your mouth Wilson, consider yourself lucky” Bucky retorts, apparently as angry as Sam his.

 

“Look Sam, we’re sorry but we have instructions, don’t make the situation more difficult, it’s just a robot” tries Steve.

“ _Just a robot?_ ” thinks Sam, the words echoing in his mind. He looks at the body. A man-made body. A fake body. Bad thoughts are dancing inside is head. He fights to not do or say something else. It’s already over, he lost LMD-Steve and he lost his friendship with Bucky and Steve. He was flooded by all the decisions leading to this moment. He had to let go of Steve, both of them.


	5. The Academy

It’s been four months since Sam tried to move on.

He couldn’t.

 

Three missions, all of them were with Steve, Bucky or the two together. The three of them worked too well so of course Nick and Maria couldn’t care less about the tension between them. They wanted shit done, so that’s what they did. Sam always managed to avoid them as soon as he could, careful not to dig his grave further.

They talk, of course, but only about whats need to be done, nothing more, nothing warm. On the second mission, they needed to stop a cult, failing to interrupt the demon invocation but stopping the two headed beast quickly anyway. Sam had been hurt that time, but before Steve could decide what to say, he was flying away to take care of his wounds himself.

Each time he met one of the two super soldiers, words got stuck in his throat. He wanted to talk to them, he wanted to be close to them again but something, maybe his pride, maybe the need to protect himself, was too strong. He can tell something similar goes on their mind but no one want to make the first step. They’re finishing the latest mission, a simple escort situation until they realize they were accidentally helping the bad guys and needed backup. Besides them, Hawkeye, Dazzler and Wasp formed the second trio but by day two, he unofficially exchanged place with Clint because he was more at ease with the two ladies. It took one week to finally make everything right and replace the stolen idol where it belongs, thanks to the local population precious help.

They were waiting around a fire behind an old farm for the jet to come take them back. It was kind of comfortable in Sam’s opinion. Alison was singing softly while the others listened. Maybe it was the night sky full of stars, or Alison’s voice, but Sam was kind of raw, feeling the lyrics in his bones.

She starts a song he knows too well and without thinking about it, he is singing too as if it was a duet all along and they were used to do it together, it’s so easy with her. Steve is siting opposite to him, so he doesn’t have that much choice but sometimes look at him. He doesn’t care that much. The lyrics rolls in his mind as he sing “If I go far away, turning away from you, then will we be able to be together like before?”. Alison pushes him a little to take the lead, so he does. He can see Bucky’s surprise on his face. Is it because of Sam’s voice or because of the song? At the end of it, all he can think is how he misses Steve. He can’t help but look at the man in front of him, thinking about how he makes him smile, how he inspires him, how he loves being next to him…but then he remembers the Interface, the relationship in some life he didn’t really had. It hurts.

He excuses himself, goes behind some trees near the road, trying to keep his feelings in check, not allowing himself to feel what is boiling inside. Someone is coming, he can hear it. He only has the time to put on a neutral face when the person stops behind him. He turns, surprised to see Bucky there. The man doesn’t have a friendly face on but Sam doesn’t want to fight. In his mind, somewhere, he knows this is his chance to make it right by Bucky. To say he is sorry, ask forgiveness and yet, his body refuses to cooperate.

They just look at each other, waiting for the other to speak. The sound of the jet increases as it approaches above them and the moment is over. Without a word, they join the others, greeting the two agents inside.

 

 

Sam sits near a window, he knows Steve and Bucky are in the ones right behind him even if they had one or two other options. He tries his best not listening to them but being this close, he can’t stop it. Clint comes to him:

“ _Hey buddy, how ya doin’?_ ”

“ _I wouldn’t mind a massage, my back is trying to murder me_ ” Sam jokes.

“ _You and me both, I hope the new guy, Thomas is here when we land, that guy is terrific, his hands, Sam, let me tell you, if somebody told me they couldn’t walk then they met him and suddenly they were dancing like Channing Tatum, I would believe it!_ ”

“ _Man, you’re over-selling him, I want it now_ ” Sam says a dreamy look on his face.

“ _Take a ticket, I’m first. Well, I am not here to talk to you about the amazing Thomas, I wanted to ask you something, I may have an opportunity for you_.”

Sam is intrigued. Clint is not known for his “opportunities”, in fact, each time he heard that word from the man, a terrible, terrible idea had follow.

“ _What are you talking about?_ ”

“ _You’re good with people…usually_ ” starts Clint, interrupted by Bucky’s laugh follow by the sound of what was probably Steve trying to shush him. “ _Well except the two super soldiers behind us_ ”, he adds, making Bucky laugh again.

“ _Okay, whatever you want, you could have done without mentioning that even if it’s true_.”

“ _Don’t be embarrassed, we all fall in love with a partner one day. We don’t live secret lives with them in our head but I don’t judge_ ”. Sam can feel the heat in his face, his lips are tight. He tries to sound casual but his pitch his higher than usual.

“ _Clint, what can I do for you? Let me tell you that I already want to say no, just because of your intro_.”

“ _I need you to mentor some of the kids at the Academy, since last summer we are kind of short of staff and we want good people, not people with some dark motive like Pym and Stark. It’s for the last six month of the cursus, debuting well…in one week_ ”

“ _One week?_ ” they hear Steve say, poking his head above the seat, brows almost touching.

Sam feels uncomfortable in his seat, it is a nice offer, he loves helping people and maybe it could be a good experience for him too? He likes the people here, he has friends here, family but…maybe this is what he needs? One week is hella short but, why not? The voice of Bucky rises from behind them:

“ _Maybe you should try to recruit someone else for that Clint, Sam has a lot of things here, he won’t go in your little middle of nowhere-ville. Where is that anyway? Fresno ?_ ”

“ _I don’t see the problem, why do you care? You’re both are giving him the silent treatment. Maybe you like to make him miserable, look at that!_ ”, he points to Sam, making the two men behind to rose to get an eyeful, « _he look ashy like someone sucked all the glow from his skin, and not in a good way_ ”

Sam is livid, mouth open, looking at Clint to try to maybe him stop. Was he trying to help him or exposes him?

“ _Don’t look at me like that Captain, it’s the truth and only the truth, I am taking him where he will truly be appreciated, let’s make the kids fly on the path of Justice Sam_.” He says finally turning to look him in the eye.

“ _He…he is appreciated…here_ ” starts to argue Steve.

There’s a moment of silence when Clint seems to have a silent conversation with the two men behind. Sam don’t want that anymore, the thickness when he is next to them. It may be a dumb idea but so his staying in his current predicament.

“ _I dunno, you really think I can help?_ ”

“ _You’re a good leader Sam, we all know that. Don’t let some mistakes hold you back. Everybody makes mistakes_ ” he then lower his voice but, to be honest, he still isn’t that discreet

“ _Besides, we all know the “situation” here. I give you an excuse to leave and you give me your talent. Also, you’re one of the few who appreciate my sense of humor_ ”

Sam could choke on air with the bluntness of Clint. Once again, he was making sense, but he needed some diplomacy.

“ _Maybe I should do it_ ” murmurs Sam to himself, except Clint hears him anyway.

“ _Wait, what?_ ” asks Bucky from behind before being promptly ignored.

“ _Awesome, dude, we are gonna make so much good work. Let me tell you about the kids!_ ”

And Clint spends the next hour showing him pictures and who is who. Telling him that his family is loving it here and that he knows one or two men he wants to introduce to Sam. Even if at first, he had reservations about the idea, Clint’s motivation is infectious and soon, he can visualize pretty well his future new life. He has a smile on his face when he gets off the jet.

 

One week is all he needed to have everything handled. He is ready to go and feels that way too. His goodbyes are going well, seeing Wanda, Sharon, Vision and Scott. The rest of team being on missions except for two supersoldiers. He doesn’t know where they are and isn’t actively looking for them. “ _It’s better that way_ ” he thinks, “ _What would I even say?_ ” but maybe he’ll have to figure it out anyway because a wild and grumpy Bucky Barnes is walking with determination in his direction, blocking with his metal arm the elevator, the one Sam is in.

“ _You have some nerves Wilson, you really ain’t shit_ ”

“ _Hello to you too Barnes_ ” deadpans Sam wondering what did he do this time.

“N _ot only are you really going to leave but you don’t even have the balls to talk to us, to him, not even to say goodbye? Sam!_ ”

He looks at Barnes, narrowed eyes, head going left to right softly.

“ _You can’t be serious right now_ ”

“ _Oh, I am. I really didn’t believe you would go_ ” admits Bucks, hurt in his voice.

Sam looks at him, confusion and surprise dancing in his eyes.

“ _You’re joking right? We just spent months without acknowledging each other if it weren’t necessary. Now that I’m leaving you want to act like this kind of things matters to you?_ ”

Sam tries very hard not to feel the anger, but it’s so hard. He doesn’t know why Bucky has this effect on him, making him nervous.

“ _Stops that Sam, don’t you understand? You can’t admit when you do something wrong without attacking right away. We thought you would have come to one of us eventually_ ”

Sam bites is lips, trying to choose his words carefully.

“ _You’re right about me, it’s too late anyway_ ”, he passes his hand on his face in a tired gesture. Bucky is looking at him expectantly. “ _I can’t express what I feel without making an ass of myself. I wanted to come to you, to both of you, but it’s just too hard. I am sorry Bucky, leaving is what’s best right now, besides, I already said yes_ ”

Suddenly, Bucky is hugging him, fiercely, and Sam get with the program immediately.

“ _Come back, okay? Whenever you ready, come back. We are not better without you, and even if you don’t believe me, know that Steve would never want you away from him_ ”.

“ _Man, don’t tell me that, you’ll make me cry_ ”.

“ _Don’t, you’re ugly when you cry and it’ll make me cry too_ ” tries Bucky voice shaking.

Ok, they’re crying a little now, still hugging the life out of each other.

“ _I have to go. I’ll see you again anyway_ ”

“ _I know, you love my face_ ”. Sam pushes Bucky playfully in the shoulder, wipe some tears then say goodbye, going to Fresno with a lighter heart.

 

Sam is so proud right now. When he first met the team he was going to mentor, not only wasn’t they used to their own abilities, but they didn’t get along at all. Now? Oh boy, he could feel that he has the best team out of all the mentors.

How many bet did he won against Clint, Danny or even, sometimes, Valkyrie? He admits, he has some reservations at first with the infamous opening of the Academy and its purpose then but removing Pym as headmaster was a good idea, allowing a more genuine goal and setting his student on the right path. Sam was used to deal with people with various type of powers and thank god he had that experience because his team was hella powerful, even with having the least students of all the mentors with only four of them but they needed the work, yeah, they did. At first, only two of them, Noriko and Humberto seems to appreciate him, enjoying listening to his stories and taking his advices in the most efficient way. He had a harder time gaining the trust of Paige who thought he was going to turn on them at any given time. The last one is Johnny, a dude who reminds him of Peter in a very annoying way because of his powers and his tendency to make jokes in inappropriate times.

It’s been seven month now, he was supposed to stay only for six of them but they had the graduation next week and he didn’t want to go before that. He was excited, it was some sort of show and exams in the same time with a jury and all. He was proud of his team and hoped that they would do well. As they finish the latest training session, and gently pat a towel on his sweaty face (he always train with them and loves it), his phone starts to vibrate. It’s Bucky. They did exchange some texts since he was gone but for the most part they didn’t had that much contact. No need to say, he only heard about Steve by sneaky ways and doesn’t know much besides that he is alive.

“ _What’s wrong?_ ” he asks, fearing that something awful happened. Barnes never calls him.

“ _Why would something be wrong? Can’t a guy call a friend?_ ” answers Bucky with an innocent tone.

“ _Oh so now you acknowledging our friendship? How are you?_ ”

“ _You sure do love to make that difficult, well, I’m fine, and I’m here, in the Academy, so brings your big ass in the parking because we are going out baby_ ”

Sam was laughing, half incredulous.

“ _You are here? You’re lying_ ”

“ _Come on, Sam, less talking, more drinking_ ” he hears Clint say to the phone, proving that he must indeed be here.

He can’t help the smile on his face while he warns them that he needs a shower and will be here in half an hour.

 

Hugging Bucky seems to be a thing now, not that he’s complaining but it’s a novelty he didn’t knew he would appreciate. Now that he thinks about it, he never hugged Bucky in the Interface. The three of them catches up with each other’s on their way to Sergei’s Pub. Clint waste no time bringing them tequila shot.

“ _So_ ,” Sam starts while Clint is on the phone with Laura outside, « _what’s bring you here?_ ”

“ _Well, I’m gonna be a judge it seems, for the graduation, and I have to know the place a little before that_.”

Sam takes a shot, making the small glass roll between his fingers.

“ _Uh, uh, ok, a judge hun? Who taught it was a good idea? You know you can’t murder them right?_ ”

“ _Very funny Wilson, I’ll make sure to make an extra trap just for you_ ”

They smile, a small comfortable silence between them.

“ _Well, it’s good to see you, you know?_ ” confesses Sam a little nervous suddenly.

“ _Oh, I know. I told you, you would miss this handsome face_ ” Sam rolls his eyes, still smiling.

“ _How is everyone?_ ” he asks, looking at the empty glasses.

“ _Ask what you really want to know_ ” answers Bucky with a knowing look.

Sam thinks of playing dumb but he didn’t spend seven month away to do the same shit again.

“ _How is Steve?_ ”

“ _You would know if you had called him_ ” he answers, grinning.

“ _What was the point of making me ask if you were planning to answer like that?_ ” snaps Sam half scandalized half laughing.

“ _I just wanted to know if you were better at admitting things than before_ ” explains Bucky with a grin.

Sam takes another shot, feels a little burning sensation and put the glass with the three already empty.

“ _I miss him_ ” he admits.

“ _So, why don’t you tell him? You truly are your worst enemy Wilson, this is fascinating_ ”

Sam pouts, Clint comes back, beers in hands. It doesn’t stops Sam from talking, after all, Clint’s know all of it too at this point.

“ _The more time passes, the more stupid I feel you know? It’s just…I know you told me that he would not be better without me, I know, I just…it’s hard accepting it. On the bright side I can’t let him down if I’m not in his life that much right?_ ”

Bucky is shaking his head, Clint sight.

“ _Sam, can you do one tiny things for me?_ ” asks Bucky, looking him in the eyes, taking his hands. Sam nods. “W _e gave you space, we gave you time, now you have to square up and talk to him even if he acts like a wall next time you’ll see him, can you do that? Once and for all? We fucking miss you but let me tell you, and I already told that to Steve. It may have make sense month ago but you are both taking this the wrong way now. Are you two going to avoid each other’s for the rest of your life?_ ”

Maybe it’s because Bucky seems genuinely tired and serious but Sam nods again, murmuring a small “ _yeah, I’ll do it_ ”.

“ _What did you say?_ ” asks Clint, more because he wants Sam to own it than because he didn’t hear.

“ _Next time I’ll see Steve, I will talk to him and I promise I will do better_ ”.

Bucky and Clint are cheering, taking another round of tequila.

Sam didn’t know they were literally scheming behind his back, letting him think he would have time to see it coming.

 

None of the student or even mentor were allowed in the back of the Academy during the last three days, people preparing everything for the exam. Some tried to sneak of course but a cloaking barrier made sure they couldn’t.

It’s two in the afternoon when Sam catches Clint to review one last time the program before having to prepare himself. They are at the front door, some guests already here.

“ _Don’t be too mad if your team fails Sam. I know you did your best and that’s very impressive so thank you, they needed it, but you’ll probably have to spend next year here too_."

“ _We’ll see about that, the judges will be shook when they’ll see my team. Shook, Clint. About that, I don’t think I saw who was supposed to judge. Bucky, that’s for sure, Hank and who else?_ ”

Clint smiles, looking at something behind Sam briefly before answering:

" _Ororo is a judge too and the last one is…_ ”

“ _Me_ ” a voice behind Sam says.

He turns and “ _Oh, my, god"_  he thinks, looking at Steve in a deep blue suit. The man is even finer than in Sam memories. He stares, they’re no other way to put it. He is staring at Steve from the hair to the shoes and gulps. Whoever helped him choose the suit is doing the lord’s work. It must be Sharon, probably, and with that, Sam snaps out of his daydream, still looking at Steve who is smiling, face a little red.

“ _You like the suit?_ ” he asks almost coyly, turning on himself.

And Sam nods, mouth opening and closing a few times as he can’t seems to find appropriate words until Clint pokes him in the hips.

“ _Yeah, it’s, uh, really…it really suit you. Oh, sorry, I mean, it’s good, it look good, on you. Or you look good in it? I don’t know, I mean, it’s really good with your eyes color, because they are blue, not the same shade but…well, you know_ ”

Clint is downright laughing at him right now and Sam can’t believe the word vomits that came out of his own mouth. “ _What the hell?_ ” he thinks, suddenly self-conscious in his lazy Sunday training tank top and a short…let just say that the short was doing the bare minimum at covering anything past mid-thigh. Now, Sam knows he is thirsty as hell, he tried to hook up with people in the last few month but it didn’t click and he was left unsatisfied as hell so he isn’t surprise to actually act like Steve is his personal oasis in the desert. He still need to act like a professional damn it. This is not the look you give someone you haven’t talk with in months.

“ _Well, it seems that it is time for me to make myself presentable if you’ll excuse me_ ” and with that, Sam is running across the Academy in direction of his room.

“ _That was awkward_ ” comments Clint still looking at were Sam was not fifteen seconds ago before turning to Steve, definitely blushing, a smile on his face.

 

Both the stadium and immense park are used during the exams, participants and mentors discovers each challenge one after another. There’s maybe fifty guests between members of the family, Xmen or Avengers and the management team see Sam, adjusting is suit while the students are locked inside without the possibility of looking till they are called. The exams consists of four challenges. Each judge prepared one with the Direction. They were meant to test the ability of the student to work alone or together. The mentors are supposed to guide them or help them in the group’s scenarios.

The first test was Hank’s with a parkour full of traps. Without surprise, Johnny isn’t affected by any of this because of his danger alert while Paige, mid-track choose to simply take a diamond form and barge in. Sam didn’t know if it was a good idea but it kind of work, he hopes.

The second one is from Bucky, it has four robots and one leader. They needed to defeat all of them within fifteen seconds of each one before they came back. Because they didn’t tell the student this “subtlety” and because they couldn’t see what the previous person had done, some took way longer than the others to figure it out. Noriko probably was one of the fastest, her power coming very handy in this situation.

The third test was from either Ororo. As a team, they needed to find a way of all acceding a platform near the Academy’s roof which would have be all fine and dandy except for the lighting and wind she would occasionally send to them, often making one of them fall from it. If you couldn’t fly, jump that high or teleport, you needed to climb. Humberto was the most extra of all the students. Homeboy just transforms himself into a diplodocus, allowing the others to safely reach the platform before he joined them. Sam couldn’t hide his proud smile, clapping and waving at them “ _That’s my team!_ ». He could see the judges taking notes but wasn’t near enough to know what it was about.

Ultimately, Steve challenge came. It was a capture the flag battle royal were the first one to take the flag from Captain America would won. The mentors couldn’t take the flag themselves and needed to incapacitate the other teams or block Steve long enough for one of the members to catch up. Sam tells Humberto to team up with Paige to go rapidly to Steve, Noriko was the joker, she wouldn’t be able to take the flag from Steve alone. Sam took Johnny, hoping that Steve would lower is guard at the Peter look-a-like. Each team starts at a different point, Steve is in the center.

As soon as they start, Steve turns and run toward the forest behind the Academy. Sam is ready, even if it means that flying would not be of much use to find him once inside. He hopes that Humberto don’t meet Valkyrie’s team, one of them can control animals so if he decides to fully transforms, it’ll be a mess. He hears some students screams and medicals drone flying in their directions. Alison is the MC and her voice announces who is out. Valkyrie’s team must have encounters Danny’s because they both lost two members each.

“ _Reptil is out, he was no match against Finesse and her mentor, the Iron Fist. Oh, well, Finesse is out too, it seems that Noriko Ashida did avenge her”_ she laughs at her own joke.

Sam and Johnny founds what is an all-out zone. Valkyrie, Clint and four students tries to corner Steve and they hesitate between attacking him or the others. Two students tries to take the flag from his right hand but he simply duck and one of them finishes in a tree while the other it promptly toss against Clint. Half an hour later, only five remains. Valkyrie, Ava from her team, Laura from Danny’s, Johnny and Sam. They decide to get rid of the men and tries to attack the two of them. Now, Sam is good, but against Valkyrie and Ava at the same time while Laura tries to come for Steve? He needs a better plan.

“ _Johnny, starting point_ ” he says, the teenager nodding before leaping in the forest.

“ _Oh, you’re that confident?”_ purrs Ava, “ _three against one, this will be so easy_ ”.

Unfortunately for her, Sam still have his wings. He rushes to Laura and with a quick kick ejects her in direction of Steve who catches before dropping her like a hot potato. It’s a good distraction because they starts to fight. He fly in Steve’s direction. He can’t take the flag, but he can take Steve.

“ _What is that? Isn’t that the Falcon carrying Captain America like they do is missions? Well, we hope not because he is basically carrying him by his feet but, hey, it works! He better hurry, they are coming his way extra quickly, will they intercept them? Yeaaaaaaaah, and no! At the last second Johnny leap straight in front of his mentor and SNATCH the flag. Ladies and Gent, we have our winner, against all odds, Ricochet is the one coming on top of this challenge. I know some people are maaaaaad but I want to personally remember some of you that you can’t opt out the betting pool"_.

Sam is so happy right now, his team screaming and running to them. He tells to each of them how proud he is and they are just beaming. He feels a hand on his shoulders and turns to see Steve, smiling at him.

“ _You did good Sam, it was impressive_ ”

That smile, that look…it’s been so long, Sam has to stop himself from taking Steve in his arms.

“ _Yeah, they are awesome_ ” he agrees, happy that his dark skin hide his blush for the most part.

“ _See you at the results then_ ”

Steve hands is still on his shoulders and maybe they shouldn’t look at each other like that for that long. He finally let’s go and walks toward the Academy.

 

After the judges meeting, each team is called to know about the results. They only had the time to change in something more suitable for the reception right after. Sam is happy to have a great poker face because he definitely can’t handle seriously Bucky as a judge for teenagers. He can see the good cop / bad cop dynamic he has with Steve when they comment and give the results. Finally, five students out of twenty two must stay the summer to have the final validation, no lost causes. Now, they can finally enjoy the party and celebrate.

Everything is fine, the food is delicious, the music is good, the place is beautiful and Sam almost feels like the good old times with Steve and Bucky. He knows they are still tiptoeing around each other a little but it’s definitely better than before. He can feel Bucky trying to push him to have “ _the talk_ ” with Steve, he doesn’t really want to ruin the moment but he cal also see that the long haired-man nervously look at his phone every now and then, Sam finally asks:

“ _Are you waiting for a lover to call or something?_ ”

He is just teasing him but for a second, his eyes are wild before he put on a neutral mask and says:

" _I don’t know what you’re talking about, maybe you should call your lover instead of worrying about mine, the one that I don’t have I mean_ ”

“ _You’re seeing someone Sam?_ ” Steve asks casually, maybe more to stops preventively their bickering than to actually try to know.

Sam frowns, he is about to responds that no, he is still single when something else gets out of his mouth.

“ _Where is Sharon?_ ”

Steve seems weird out by the question and the fact that Sam didn’t responds isn’t unnoticed.

“ _Why would I know where Sharon is?_ ”

“ _Because you are here, and she is not. You didn’t invite her?_ ” continues Sam as if this is only logic.

“ _Why would I?_ ”

Sam makes a face, brows high, eyes rolling, drinking is martini.

“ _Why do you make that face?_ ” asks Steve visibly a little offended.

“ _Oh, nothing_ ” answers Sam, eyes escaping while he sips on his drink again.

“ _Come on Sam, say what you want to say_ ”.

And Sam can see Bucky threatening him with a glare, so he adds, shaking his drink slowly, just for the drama of it.

“ _It’s not very Gentlemen-y of you that’s all_ ”.

Steve is silent for a moment, focusing on Sam’s words. Then, taking a step toward the man, his voice is low:

“ _Why, exactly, should I know where Sharon is or what she’s doing right now? I don’t care that much_ ”.

“ _Wow, now, is that a way to talk about your girlfriend?_ ” chastises Sam tilting his head.

Bucky makes an “o” face, Clint stops whatever he was doing and frowns at Sam, Steve seems frozen then slowly put his hand on Sam arm and starts walking them without saying a thing in the corridor then in the first empty room he sees. A classroom. He doesn’t want an audience for that.

“ _Is there a problem Steve?_ ”

“ _Sam_ ” he pauses, take a deep breath arms crossed, “ _Don’t tell me you believe I am still dating Sharon, please_ ”

And Sam open his mouth but nothing comes out at first. He shrugs.

“ _I am not dating Sharon, I haven’t been dating Sharon for more than a year now, if I was dating Sharon, she would probably be here, but she is not, why? Because I am not dating Sharon. Why would you say that?_ ”

“ _Da hell? What do yo mean you are not dating Sharon? I didn’t know, why didn’t you tell me?_ ”

Now, Steve was looking at Sam with clear frustration.

“ _First of all, I tried to tell you myself a number of time. In fact, I remember clearly that the last time I tried to, Sharon and I invited you to dinner and you never show up. Probably have someone better to do, something, I mean, something better to do_.”

The slip isn’t unnoticed by Sam who can place exactly when that happens. He understand exactly what Steve is referring to, it touches a nerve.

“ _Oh my god Steve, are you still angry with me about the Interface? It’s been months!_ ”

“ _Yeah, I am, ok? I don’t care if days, month or years passes, I will still be mad about that!_ ” he declares, shameless.

“ _But why? Steve, seriously, why don’t you let go? How can you still be milking that, it wasn’t even real_.”

“ _Are your feelings for me real Sam?_ ” demands Steve, voice cold.

Sam doesn’t miss that he doesn’t talk in past tense.

“ _Come on Steve, please…_ ”

“ _No, enough Sam, I need to know why you didn’t told me anything and why, to this day you can’t say that you have feelings for me_.” S

Sam remembers his conversation with Bucky and Clint. He doesn’t want to run anymore, he wants to be honest with him.

“ _When I met you, I thought you were handsome, it’s true. I didn’t have much time to think about it because you needed me then. The more I would get to know you, the more I felt something I probably shouldn’t have felt but I couldn’t do anything. I wanted to be near you. I thought…I thought it was just friendship and that I was lusting over you. It was harmless, I believed. By the time I realized that this was deeper, you started dating Sharon and I thought that it was logic, she is a talented, strong, beautiful woman. I thought my feelings would go away you know? I just needed time to goes by. But then I had the chance to test the Interface and before I knew it, I had a version of you. I always knew it was fake but the more I saw you two together, the less I could handle being around without acting on my feelings. I didn’t want to put you in that position in the first place, I really believed that with time, I would get you out of my system. It was supposed to be my secret. But then everything went wrong. The last thing I wanted was for you to see me differently and losing our friendship and I failed._ ”

Steve still look incredulous, shaking lightly his head, passing his hand on his jaw.

“ _You think I would have completely reject you_ ”.

It’s not a question, it’s a statement.

“ _What was I supposed to do? Tell someone who is actually dating the physically opposite of you: ”Hey, I may be in love with you but I don’t want to mess with your relationship, bye”?_ ”

“ _You were supposed to trust me enough to talk to me Sam. Instead of literally date a robot-me and run away_.”

Sam doesn’t understand exactly why this is so important to Steve, he doesn’t know if he should ask but he does it anyway.

“ _Why are you still mad about it now?_ ”

“ _Because I didn’t know it was an OPTION!_ ” Steve almost shouts, looking at Sam with fire in the eyes. ” _In the same breath I learned that you are attracted to men, that you find me attractive enough to lie to us all and fight with Bucky and that it’s already too late because you have a LMD with my face with whom you had a relationship for months. And by the time I finally am in the know, all you say to everyone is that you don’t want these feelings, you took that choice, not me. Of.fucking.course.I’m.pissed._ ”

Sam calms himself immediately. Having Steve side of the story makes him more careful.

“ _It wouldn't have change anything_ ”

Steve is silent. Sam doesn’t know if it’s because he got nothing to say or doesn’t want to say anything. He turns in direction of the door and it’s only when he is ready to open it he hears: " _Yes, it would, because I would have consider it_ ”.

“ _What the hell?_ ” he thinks again and again. Then the thought that he did this to himself, that Steve could have given it a shot starts to gets louder in his head. He doesn’t feel well. He can fell Steve approaching him, until his body is right behind.

“ _Do you understand why I am angry now Sam?_ ” Then he opens the door himself and gets out.

 


	6. Birthday

Sam played the conversation with Steve again and again during the last week. As he was getting back to the Towers he finally understood what he did wrong since the beginning. He never told Steve what he wanted, everything he did was out of fear and what he wanted to hide.

Now, he wants to do things differently even if he knows that, technically, Steve didn’t say that he was actually interested in him (or even in men) but it’s fair game considering that he didn’t tell Steve the very same things.

Sam is a man with a plan and its simple : Seduce Steve Rogers.

That's why he only told Clint that he was coming back, wanting to surprise Steve. He was unpacking and deep in his thoughts when his phone starts to vibrate in his pocket. He answers without looking and feels like it’s suddenly too hot in his bedroom as his mother’s voice berates him. Half an hour later, he finally can end the call, more because her battery is dying than because she had finished telling him how bad he was for her health because he never calls and didn’t tell her that he was back, “I came back today Ma’!’ wasn’t a good answer it seems.

Anyway, it was 9:37pm and he needed to know where Steve was for his plan to be set in motion. The phone in his hand gives him an idea.

“ _Hey, Bucky, my man! How are you_?” he greets, smile in his voice.

“ _Hi Sam, I’m good, I’m about to get Steve and Nat for a drink, it’s only Wednesday but this week is already too long_ ”

“ _Yeah? Where are you heading_?” asks Sam innocently.

“ _Nnnhhh, what’s the name? You know that bar with the red beans tapas and the black beers you hate, that one_ ”.

Oh, it was perfect.

“ _Good, I have to go, see you later Buck’Buck_ ’”

He hangs up and starts to prepare himself. How do you dress to impress without giving the “try too hard” vibes? Not that Steve would care.

Freshly showered but still naked as a newborn, he puts a thin layer of coconut oil all over his body, he knows the supersoldiers will be able to smell it. Black shorty, charcoal grey shirt, hard blue jeans, black boots, trimmed, haircut two days ago. He is ready.

 

* * *

 

 

He enters the bar (more like a brasserie in fact) and goes straight to the table where Steve, Natasha and Bucky are seated. They are easy to find, it’s always the one near the kitchen. He can see the surprise on Nat and Bucky’s face who are the ones facing him, until Steve turns, his brows high on his forehead.

“S _am? What are you doing here?_ ” asks Steve with a mix of confusion and content.

He walks next to him, casually putting his hand on his shoulder. It's discreet, but Sam know Steve smelled the cononut scent, he seems pleased.

“ _Well, my mission is over so I wanted to be back home_ ” he answers, kissing Nat on the cheek, hugging Bucky briefly over the table (Bucky doesn't hide that he smells Sam, approving it too) then sits next to Steve, his arm over his chair. He uses his thumb against Steve back to get his attention (he already had it) and asks “ _What are you drinking?_ ”

Steve seems a little confuse, he takes a look at the bottle.

“ _An indian pale ale, it’s good_ ”.

Without even asking, Sam takes the bottle, brushing is fingers against Steve and takes a sip, feigning concentration on the taste.

“ _Yeah, it is_ ”

Bucky and Nat look at the scene, exchanging glance with each other’s. Steve is a little redder. Sam starts a conversation with Nat but doesn’t miss the way Steve slowly brings the bottle to his lips and seems flushed once done. He gets up to command at the bar, Bucky is right behind him.

“ _I see what you're doing_ ” he teases with a smile.

Sam doesn’t say anything to him, just winks and get back with his own beer, a colorful can with “Charlie don’t surf” written in a pale yellow. He can hear Bucky chuckling behind him.

He is on.

 

* * *

 

 

Every occasion of touching Steve is taken, every time they talks, he looks directly in his eyes. And he does the same things the day after during a meeting, and the day after during a mission. The low-key flirting is going very well, Steve always looks like a confuse puppy when Sam does something just a little more “bold” in his presence.

Nat seems to love watching them as she often helps create opening for Sam even if the man didn’t asked her to. He likes that, she is a true friend. Bucky rolls his eyes, clearly not understanding the importance of seduction when everybody and their mama knows that Sam is in love with Steve already. It doesn’t matter to Sam. He feels good here, with his life back on tracks and being a little closer to Steve. From what he can tell, he doesn’t mind the flirting neither discouraging nor encouraging it per se.

Missions are so much better now that everything is fine between the three of them that even Fury give them a compliment on their teamwork. Sam can barely stops the “ _thanks dad_ ” that his mouth wanted to throw.

He is so happy with himself and busy being the better version of himself that he forgets his birthday altogether.

He is sleeping like a baby on this late September day, his mind in between dream and consciousness where you have some lucidity and know it’s a dream so you…let’s just say you treat yourself. In his dream, Sam is trying to learn how to paint on a big white canvas. Steve right behind him, guiding his hands while giving him instructions in his ears, sometime kissing his lobes. Sam is chuckling, turns his head to capture Steve’s lips with his own. He puts a dot of blue paint on Steve’s cheek before the brush is taken by the blond who traces a line under Sam chin, on his t shirt…” _You’re naughty_ ” he giggles.

“ _The only naughty thing here is your dream Wilson_ ” he hears a voice say.

His eyes open wide, Bucky is the one who said that, but in his room,

Natasha, Sharon (who at least pretend not to look), Clint, Misty and Steve are all there. Sam realize in 0.5 seconds that his sleeping shirt is halfway removed and that he is lucky he is on his belly because he’s rock hard right now and was probably humping the mattress. God bless the fact that he decides to sleep with his boxer on that one time. Nat and Misty are the one with his duvet in hands.

“ _What the…_ ” he starts when they cut him with:

‘ _Happy birthday!_ ” they all shouts at the same time.

This is hella awkward.

“ _Ok, well, as you probably know I was in the middle of a fine dream so…_ ”

“ _Who were you dreaming about?_ ” asks Misty a sweet smile on her face.

Sam doesn’t know what propel him to answer honestly.

“ _About this guy_ ”, he points to Steve who blush immediately. « _So, can you go in the living room, just so I can cover myself?_ ”

“ _Don’t jerk off now, it’s impolite_ ” says Bucky, leaving the room.

“ _What kind of person jerk off when people are in the very next room waiting for him?_ ” shouts Sam taking the bait.

Steve is the last to gets out, giving Sam a shy look and a smile before closing the door.

Sam laughs.

 

* * *

 

 

He finally gets out of his bedroom only to go directly in the bathroom because he can't show himself “like that” but because he took too much time, they decided to do a raid in his food.

They definitely act as if they were at home, Nat and Steve looking at the TV while Bucky and Clint are complaining about the lack of food (Sam didn't thought he would need to feed that many people). Sharon and Misty are in a deep conversation.

Coffee in hand, he finally asks:

“ _It’s nice to have you all here but, what’s the plan_?”

“ _Well, there’s two parts, the first one is by Bucky, Clint and Sharon_ ” Nat says, then, smirking “ _The real fun is were Misty, Steve and I are take your ass tonight_ ”.

“ _Ok, so something nice and relaxing in the day then party in the night right?_ ” tries to confirm Sam.

Sharon and Bucky makes weird face, Clint is the one to comment:

“ _Relaxing? Yeah, sure, you can call it that. We have to go. Let’s move team_ ”.

Clint led them in the landing zone behind the highest tower then takes out of his pocket what look like a stone waffle with golden runes on it. He presses something Sam can’t see and a face appears, smiling.

“ _Right on time Hawkeye, where is Sam, son of Will_?”

“ _Thor? Where are you, what are you planning with Clint?_ ” asks Sam pleasantly surprised.

“ _Well, I’m on a ship right now and I’m sorry I can’t be there but he needed my help to get you on Sin-X69_ ”

“ _Sin…What? What do you…_ ”

“ _Well, have fun!_ ” cuts Thor smiling clearly knowing he had cut Sam in the middle of his sentence.

The face disappears. Clint puts the stone waffle down and it separate itself in tiny pieces making a circle around them. Before Sam can make any comment, they starts glowing, levitating and turning rapidly.  He feels himself falls even if he still standing on his feet.

It’s over in the blink of an eye and they suddenly are on what’s look like a parking. The stone waffle is complete again and Clint takes it back. Around them, other groups comes by the same method but clearly, there’s not a lot of humans around here. It’s daytime here too, the sky is greenish and Sam notices the giant transparent bubble around them englobing all of the city. A weird kind of city at that because it look like a mix between a classic city, a mall and an amusement park. Sam is sure some of the color displayed cannot be seen by the human eyes as sometimes he would only see grey or black on some parts of the buildings.

“ _Welcome to Sin-X69, this place is as huge as New York so here, take those com’ and map so we can communicate through them and locate each other._ ” Clint push a button on the one on his wrist and all of the other makes two beep. “ _I set them to have an alarm in three hours so we can all meet here in case we got separated. Push the red button two times if there’s a problem. Yes, you can breathe here but not outside of the bubble so be careful. Oh, I forgot, use that card if you want to buy things”_ , he handle them a black card with a screen on it. ” _Touch here to display the credit you have, Thor was generous enough to put some on it. Let’s just say that the dollar isn’t worth much around here_ ”.

Clint give them instruction during at least ten minutes, when they finally are free to explore, Sharon and Misty are going hand in hand in what looks like a locomotive going around the city.

Clint, Bucky and Natasha are already taking bet around some games Clint as heard of.

They leave Sam and Steve alone and Sam wonders if it’s really accidental.

“ _Well, seems like it’s only you and me, I mean, if you want it that way. We can probably join the others if you want to_ ” proposes Steve hands in his pocket.

“ _No, it’s fine, unless you want to join the others_ ” answers Sam quickly.

Steve smiles.

“ _I’m fine, what do you want to do first?_ ” he asks, looking at the holographic map Clint gave them.

They decide to start with what could only be described as a real life Mario kart. Said Kart is surround with a bubble reminding them of the giant one outside protecting the driver anytime a weapon hit them. Sam ends in the fifth place just behind Steve but he is still laughing even five minutes after the race “ _that was the coolest kart race ever, when you sent that diamond guy flying in the wall I almost crashed_ ” Sam had said, trying to focus on the map and failing.

Next was a stop in a coffee shop. Well, there was no coffee in fact but they tried the local equivalent of a bubble tea and pastry followed right after with window shopping. Sam convinces Steve to try some of the clothes. He looks good in it.

They decided to try a glass maze and starts holding hands five minutes after, not wanting to get lost forever here.

Time is passing quickly and it’s a pleasant change of scenery for both of them. The city is beautiful, some parts are full of life and some are so quiet they feel almost alone. Steve takes a lot of pictures, especially of the houses near a lake, clinging to each other like a grape or the, it seems, famous “Trees of Bewind”, three huge weeping willow with glass like leaves, casting rainbow all over the visitors. The sight is breathtaking and when Sam looks at Steve, he can feel the love inside him ready to burst.   

They’re talking on the way back to the parking, admiring the architecture of what must be a more ancient part of the city when someone tries to get their attention.

“ _Hey, you, the couple, come here and let me tell you about your future_ ” the voice says with a thick accent.

Sam, at first, doesn’t even notice someone is talking to them, it’s Steve who stops and grab Sam to look at the four arms, yellow-ish skin and hair longer than her body grandma in front of the house on their left.

“ _Yeah, you two, come here_ ” she invites waving at them.

“ _We are not…_ ”

“ _Come on Sam, it’s just for fun_ ” cuts Steve, dragging him along.

Sam, reluctantly, follows. He doesn’t really want for some stranger to tell them something bad. Moreover, this is an alien, how could he know if they doesn't have some real powers? They follow her in the little house, the ground is covered with pillows around a small table. They sit as she shakes her hair (if Sam can call the tentacles on her head “hair” now that he is closer) and motion to them to present a hand to her.

“ _As I was trying to say earlier, we are not together…like that. It’s my birthday and it’s kind of a present trip between friends, the others are in the city, somewhere_ ” explains Sam. She doesn’t look that interested in the story, she just look at the two hands, turning them, then put some saliva on her thumbs and press them in both of their palm. Sam thinks it’s nasty and takes a look at Steve who is particularly into it. Suddenly, the voice of the alien resonate in his head and some memory plays while she declares:

“ _You two share a very deep connection_. _Unfortunately, you both kind of feared this connection in a not so distant past. No matter the path you choose to take, you need each other and I can tell you will never be able to not be in each other’s life so my advice for you is : Be careful because you are at a turning point in your life. You can have or loose it all, it depends on you only._ ”

She lets their hand free.

“ _What do you mean “have or loose it all”_ ” asks Sam intrigued.

“ _I can see the connection between two souls, you, gentlemen, are at an intersection, I can feel it. There’s a light path and a dark path_.”

“ _What if we take the wrong one?_ ” wants to know Steve, looking briefly at Sam.

“ _You will both be eternally miserable. It will be twelve arons each_ ” she says with a smile.

 

* * *

 

 

By the time they are out, they need to join the others before being late. Just before arriving Steve stops Sam.

“ _About what the lady said…_ ” starts Steve hesitantly. Sam makes a sound, encouraging him to continue. “ _I…I need to know that no matter what we feel about each other, we will at least try to not cut the other totally. I know that seems kind of unrealistic and hypocritical but...The last couple of months were hard, really_ ”.

“ _They were hard for me too Steve_ ”, Sam says tone more harsh than he intended to. ” _Steve, look, we spent a long time in a bad place. I missed you. Each day I missed you_ ” he stops a little, collecting his thoughts, “ _I am done being afraid Steve, I am done apologizing for my feelings and I am done hiding myself. What we are, or what we will be or could be…You know how I feel about you_ ”

“ _Well, in fact, you kind of never told me, you were just…outed by the circumstances_.” Points Steve, starting to walk again, slowly.

“ _Come on Steve, what can be more explicit than having a LMD with your body?_ ” jokes Sam, feeling better.

“ _I’ll let you think about it_ ” challenges Steve; biting his lips to hide a smile.

 

* * *

 

 

Sharon and Misty are already there, busy with each other.

“ _Why is your skin blue?_ ” asks Sam, a little shocked.

“ _I'm blue da ba dee da ba daa_ ” starts to sing Steve, earning him three deadpan faces. “ _What, this song is appropriate_ ”

“ _How do you know that horrible song?_ ” asks Sharon with her pale blue skin.

“ _Well…Scott and Tony, they told me it was a classic_ ” says Steve, blushing.

Sam laugh. The very idea of Scott and Tony of all people trying to educate Steve in pop culture was hilarious to him.

Clint, Natasha and Bucky are next, with a strange way of walking, they all look uncomfortable.

“ _Well, you are all here already, wait, why are you blue you two?_ ” notes Natasha, looking at the two women.

“ _Can we go already?_ ” asks Clint, grumpier than when he arrived.

“ _Didn’t you all have fun? You look like someone peed in your cereal_ ” observes Misty with concern.

“ _And you look like a schtroumpf!_ ” almost shouts Natasha, jumpy.

“ _What’s going on?_ ” asks Steve tone suddenly serious, arms crossed over his torso. He is eyeing them one by one.

“ _Nothing, everything is peachy-fresh_ ” tries to reassure Clint.

Steve plants himself in front of him, looking into his eyes. Clint tries to hold eye contact. Then he goes to Natasha who doesn’t even try to pretend she wants to look at Steve, her head is bowing down. Finally, he goes to Bucky.

“ _Hey…Stevie…_ ”

Steve eyes are two fine line, he goes to Natasha, still looking at the ground.

“ _What did you do Bucky?_ ”

“ _Bucky?!_ ” says Sharon and Sam at the same time.

Natasha seems a little nervous, bite her lips and exhale loudly like Bucky Barnes would do.

“ _So maybe we took a sip of something we weren’t supposed to drink…_ ”

“ _Oh, come on!_ ” groans Steve.

Understanding the situation, Sharon and Misty mock them openly, phone in hand, already taping it.

“ _Wait a minute, which one of you is Natasha then?_ ” asks Sam, barely containing his own laughter. Clint raises his hand then role his eyes. “ _Which mean, Clint is in Bucky?_ ”

“ _First of all, Clint is not in me, Natasha’s voice argument, if anything, I would be the one in Clint so jot that down_ ”

Sharon and Misty are laughing louder and louder.

“ _So, what you are saying is that you already thought about being in Clint_ ” guesses Sam.

“ _This is not...Why would you…_ ”

“ _Oh, I am flattered buddy, I knew you wanted to tap that ass too_ ” smirk Clint in Bucky’s body.

“ _What do you mean by “too”_ ” continues Sam.

“ _Well, Tony and Pepper already proposed Clint and Laura some…bonding time_ ” answers Natasha with Clint voice.

Steve cut them all.

“ _How long will you stay like that?_ ”

“ _Only a couple of minute, I think_ ”, plead Clint.

He wasted no time taking the stone waffle from Nat and uses it to bring them back to earth.

“ _This is the best birthday ever_ ” smiles Sam.

 

* * *

 

 

Three hours later, Sam finds himself in front of Tony’s home and by home he mean a mansion. Swimming pools, Jacuzzi, three floors, a beautiful garden, water fountain, champagne fountain, chocolate fountain, and in the main reception room, pictures of Sam taken by his friends in poster size. He can’t really understand why Tony would help throw a party in his honor because they definitely weren’t best friend but he appreciates it anyway and find the man near what look like a stage.

“ _Sam Wilson, the birthday boy_ ” he greets “ _What do you think of this little, intimate, party?_ ”

“ _It’s very generous of you, it’s very beautiful, thank you Tony_ ” answers Sam with honesty, shaking his hand.

After that, at Sam own surprise, they spent the next twenty minutes talking together, joined by Pepper and Rhodes. Sam didn’t even drink at that point but still, his heart feels lighter and lighter.

Enjoying the band that started playing ten minutes ago, he suddenly have an idea. He starts looking for Alison who is using a room behind the scene as her personal dressing room.

“ _Hey Alison, it’s good to see you. You are going to sing tonight?_ ” he asks, kissing her cheeks while a hairdresser is working on her pink hair.

“ _You know I will, could you believe Tony thought about hiring a nobody to sing at your birthday? When I am here?_ ”

“ _Scandalous_ ” he agrees, smiling at her tone. “ _Well, I need a little favor, I need to do “the plan”, tonight_ ”

She is glowing, literally, soft luminous waves emanate from her face, she wipes an imaginary tear.

“ _It’s about time! Glad you finally made a good choice_ ”

“ _Hey!_ "  he protests mildly, pouting a little _“I’ll have you know that I make a lot of good decisions_ ”

She gives him a eye and a “ _mm mmh_ ” clearly telling him what she thinks about that. “ _Anyway, here’s what we are going to do…_ ”

 

* * *

 

 

 It’s been nearly an hour since Steve has seen Sam. The mansion is big enough for him to get out of his sight and he doesn’t want to look like he is looking for him because he is not, he just want to know where he is because the party is for him okay?

“ _Do you want us to start looking for your ex future boyfriend?_ ” proposes Bucky, champagne in hand and top knot on point.

“ _He is not..._ ” Steve rolls his eyes, “ _It’s just that it’s been an hour, it’s weird don’t you think?_ ”

 _“Maybe he is busy with someone who is giving him some sugar, he seemed quite horny this morning_ ” comments Bucky.

The look on Steve face is priceless.

“ _Do you know something that I don’t?_ ” asks Steve way too seriously.

Bucky puts his hands on Steve shoulder and starts massage them a little.

“ _Relax, I’m joking, there’s no way Sam would look at someone else, he could practically proposes you here and now_ ”

Steve blushes.

Alison is going on stage now and starts singing, a band behind her. People don’t take long before dancing.

Sam seems to appear from nowhere, Peter on his side, making wild movement with his arms. Steve can hear Sam laugh. His body is less tense now than he knows where Sam is.

Peter is in a middle of a story while Natasha and Misty join them.

“ _We did the good thing didn’t we?_ ”

Sharon is near him, a soft smile on her face. He knows immediately what she is talking about.

“ _Yeah, it took us a while…Even if you were quicker than me to recognize what was going on_ ”

Steve could swear Sam looked at them for one second before turning his head and drinking whatever is in his hand.

“ _Are you ready for it Steve?_ ” Sharon asks, concern in her voice “ _You two wasted so much time already_ ”

Steve agrees with her, he knows they needed to be ready, both in their own way. Maybe things could have been different, better, but he isn’t interested in “what if”. He hugs her.

“ _Yeah, I’m good_ ” he murmurs.

He turns, looking for Sam and locks eye with him for a second. Sam breaks the visual contact as he gets out of the room. Steve fights the urge to follow him. Sam wouldn’t have a problem with him hugging Sharon right? Especially since he knows that she is with Misty. “ _Have faith_ ” he tells himself again and again. He can’t stop himself from being a little nervous.

Steve realize that everyone is in the room, except Sam. The lights went out and on the scene, Alison stands here, generating soft luminous bubbles like candle flames floating away. She starts speaking in the mic..

“ _Hi everyone, I hope you are having fun tonight. As you all know, we are here, in this beautiful home to celebrate Sam Wilson birthday. Even if I don’t know the man for that long, I am lucky to be able to call him a friend. Ladies and gentlemen, make some noise for the birthday boy._ ”

People starts to applause as Sam gets up on the scene from behind, mic in hand.

“ _Thank you Ali' and once again, thank you Tony. This is truly one of the best day of my life. As you may know, I had kind of a rough year._ ” Some people chuckles. “ _It was challenging but it gave me the occasion to grow. I cannot say how much I appreciate you all in my life and what it means to me to have you here tonight_.” He breathe. ” _I want to use this opportunity to sing a song to someone here who is very special to me_ ” Sam can hear the intrigues murmurs.

The band starts to play. Alison is doing the vocal backup next to him. He shuts his eyes. He got this.

“ _I often tell myself that we could be more than just friends_ ” he starts, not looking at anyone specific till he hits the line “ _I live in misery when you’re not around_ ”, eyes on Steve and only him, in front of him, expression unreadable from where Sam is. He puts everything in the song, his heart is naked, doesn’t even know how he hits the notes.

Once it’s done, he feels on the verge of crying but put on a smile as the light come back, he adds “ _I hope I made myself clear enough Steve_ ”.

The audience is quiet, looking at the two men, leaving a clear line between the two.

“ _Steve seems so shy_ ” thinks Sam before getting off the stage. The blond takes the few steps separating them.

“ _That was…_ ” Steve starts but seems to be at lost for words. “ _What you…urrgh_ ” he puts his hand on Sam neck to bring him closer until their body met then kisses him, in the middle of everyone. Sam holds on to him like this is the last thing he will ever do. They separate, forehead against forehead.

“ _You were perfectly clear Sam Wilson_ ”

“ _Does that mean…_ ” asks Sam, voice shaking.

“ _Yeah, anything you want_ ”

Steve kisses him again and this time, he can ear everyone cheering in the room. It makes him laugh against Steve mouth. Then he puts his head on the small of his neck and hugs him.

This is definitely the best day of his life.

 


	7. Let's try

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's smut in this chapter, I hope you'll like it.

The party was a blast, Sam’s cheeks hurt from smiling that much. Most of the guest already left, leaving Tony, Pepper, Bucky, Natasha, Steve and Sam to end the night (which was more like really early morning at that point).

During the rest of the night, Steve didn’t leave Sam’s side even if it was a little awkward to move from a friendship to a romantic relationship in the middle of a party, not really giving the opportunity to adjust and reflect on was it meant for them. Tony had proposed an hour earlier for them to spend the night here, for what, they were grateful. Sam excuses himself and wishes goodnight to everyone, except, when it’s Steve’s turn, he doesn’t know if he should propose to sleep together or not, so they face each other, both blushing.

“ _Look at Steve, trying to pretend he doesn’t want to sleep with his new boyfriend”_ murmurs Bucky, not trying to be subtle at all.

“ _Steve is a gentleman, not like you_ ” responds Natasha, ready to go too.

“ _I would have already have sex with Sam three times if I were him_ ” agrees Bucky without shame.

Sometimes, Sam wonders if Bucky could have sex with every human with a pulse. He doesn’t even takes the comment personally.

“ _Each bedroom in soundproof if that’s what’s stopping you_ ” proposes Tony almost innocently.

“ _Please guys, leave them alone, this is the first night for them and maybe Steve wants to be the birthday present without you all commenting on it_ ”

“ _Pepper is right, let’s not add another word and just look at them until they decide what to do_ ” says Tony, all four of them looking at Steve and Sam now.

Sam rolls his eyes, takes Steve hand and goes upstairs. Once in front of one of the numerous free bedroom, Steve stops Sam with a gentle press of his hand.

“ _Maybe…we can just sleep together tonight, and I mean, sleep-sleep, not, umh, you know…I mean, I want it, I definitely want it, but maybe we should have a talk before doing it, just to be on the same page and go from there?”_

Sam nods, opening the door to let Steve in. Lucky them, a bathroom is attached to the room. They dance around each other even more shyly than when they were only friends, not even using the bathroom at the same time.

He is already in bed when Steve comes out and goes in the bed. At first, they’re both on their back, next to the other, looking at the ceiling. Steve takes a deep breathe then turns, putting his head on Sam chest then his arm and leg on the other man as well while Sam hugs him with one arm. They finally fall asleep while Sam prays his boner won’t be too noticeable.

 

* * *

 

 

Being honest to each other allows them to understand better where they are coming from. They try not to rush things too much but when Steve tries to kiss his soul out of his body, Sam realizes that being with Steve is nothing like in the Interface. It’s real, it’s better. And he needs some self-control to not just rip his clothes off.

It’s almost a week after Sam birthday, they are watching a movie, Sam being the little spoon on the couch of Steve apartment.  Sam giggles each time Steve brushes his lips against his neck. He turns himself to kiss his boyfriend, slowly, teasingly. He doesn’t know why but this time, he climbs on top of Steve, kissing him with more intent. His tongue brushes against Steve lips and the blond doesn’t need more to depend the kiss making them moan in each other. Sam, trying to get more comfortable, spread Steve tights so he is between them, making him let a muffled sound. “ _You okay? We don’t have to…”_ Steve cuts him by bringing him back in the kiss, grinding lightly his hips against Sam, their bodies closer until he can feel Sam’s erection against his own.

Suddenly, he takes Sam, making them reverse position. He yelps a little, maybe he likes to be handled like that, maybe he didn’t knew that before now. Steve removes the other man t shirt, kisses his jaw, his neck, his pecs, teases the nipple, making Sam moan louder just before he places his hand on his mouth to stop himself. The look on Steve face clearly shows his pleasant surprise at the sound, and he goes back, his eyes on Sam face as his pink tongue dart out of his mouth to circle the sensitive darker skin.

“ _Stop that_ ” moan Sam, face hot.

“ _You don’t like it? I’m sorry…”_

“ _No, no, I do like it, very much, you are apparently quite…skilled with that mouth so, if you want to keep it light, maybe you shouldn’t press that kind of AHHH!”_ Sam lets escape an undignified sound when Steve attacks again, the suction makes his body arches, his tights closing on the blond.

_“Maybe we should stop keeping it light Sam”_ he breathe, using the moment Sam hips are in the air to grope his jeans and make them slide, boxer too, freeing his hard penis.

Steve seems kind of surprised and Sam starts to feel embarrassed until Steve smiles, gropes his length and presses just a little, making a transparent drop pearl at the tip. Sam can only be a witness as Steve’s thumbs come recover the liquid and puts it in his mouth. Before Sam can think of anything to say, Steve mouth is kissing his dick, stroking it a little before starting to lick it.

“ _Damn, Rogers_ ” Sam ears himself say, looking at Steve red face.

The man is enthusiastic even if his technique could be refined. After some time, he decides he can’t let Steve have all the fun like that, he makes him undress too, and takes an eyeful of Captain America’s glory. He will show him how it’s done.

Sam can’t take it all in his mouth but that doesn’t mean that Steve doesn’t have his eyes rolled back with the way his head is bobbing and his hands are mapping his body.

“ _Sam…I want…I want to come while sucking you_ ” plead Steve and Sam bites his lips, he froze for two seconds before a lustful look bloom on his face.  He makes Steve sit down then get up on the couch, standing, to allow Steve access. One of Steve hand is now on his ass encouraging him to move.

He is slowly but surely fucking Steve’s face and he can feel the man jerking himself off with his free hand.

“ _Steve, I will…I will…”_

Steve just let enough of Sam’s length out to say “ _Come for me babe_ ” before sucking him again.

Sam can’t believe his own ears, yet, here he is, babbling a concerto of “ _damn_ ”, “ _fuck_ ” and “ _mmmh_ ” before letting his lover name right before flooding his mouth. Almost immediately, Steve his coming too all over his chest.

Sam gets off the couch, looks at Steve, wasted, legs spread, hand still on his dick. He can’t control himself, he leans in to kiss him, tasting his own sperm in Steve mouth who moans against him. He loves that sound.

“ _Sam, that was...”_

“ _A little filthy? Yeah, I don’t know where that came from_ ” he laughs.

Steve is red, but now is not the time to play coy.

“ _I am not complaining, you are beautiful and to be honest, I kind of like your taste I think_ ”

Sam jaw is dropping, he doesn’t even realizes a parts of him is back in the game.

“ _Well, well, well, Wilson, round two already?”_

 

* * *

 

 

Intimacy is a beautiful thing and Sam couldn’t deny that being with Steve in that way definitely bring them closer. It wasn’t just a sex thing, the communication was better too, not letting any issue takes stupid proportions. Moral was higher and some of their close friends did notice it. That’s why Bucky is trying with little to no subtlety to talk about it with Steve right after a mission.

“ _So, Steve, you’re kind of glowing lately_ ”

Steve, taking place in car, ready to go home, gives him a questioning look. The mission went well but it was kind of long. He wanted nothing more than going back to the Towers and spend time with his man.  “ _With my man_ ” he thinks, still amaze. It was different and the same, being with a man. It couldn’t pinpoint what was different exactly but something in the vibe, the energy was not the same. Not better or worse, just different. Being with Sam was an evidence, two weeks in, maybe he was still in his honeymoon phase but it just “clicked” for him. He didn’t want to be too fast but he had a good feeling about them.

“ _I mean, I sleep better now than before_ ”

“ _And by sleep, you mean…_ ” presses Bucky, wanting to know everything.

“ _I mean sleep, you perv!”_

“ _Come on Steve, I saw how Sam looks at you, and I surely saw how you look at him. I have eyes and both our eyesight are better than the average human so I know Sam’s ass makes you check twice, I know he must have a good dick, I can feel it! Make a bro dream a little_ ” demands Bucky, eyebrows wiggling while the car starts moving.

Steve is a tomato, as always as soon as you talk about Sam lately.

“ _We didn’t do all that_ ” he confesses.

“ _You want to make me believe, you still didn’t saw him naked? Not even a little lickity-lick?”_

_“We just didn’t…you know…done “that””_ he tries to explain and hope Bucky will understand without having to enunciate it.

“ _What’s stopping you? Is everything alright?”_ he asks, concerned.

“ _Everything alright Buck, I can’t believe I’m telling you this…It’s just that I didn’t do anything like that before and I don’t know who is supposed to do what_ ”

“ _Well, ask him you dork_ ”

“ _Lord, Bucky, I can’t ask him if he prefers to enter me or me in him, what if he wants to do me and I don’t like that_ ” responds Steve scandalized.

Bucky considers it during enough time that Steve thinks he has dropped the subject, he didn’t.

“ _Steve, life is too short to wonder about who puts his dick in who. Just ask him, it can’t be that terrible. The guy confesses his love in front of all of our friends, I think you can survive ask him if he is more of a top or a bottom_ ”

Steve seems a little annoyed but nods, still, he feels hot thinking about asking that. Communication with Sam was easier, yet, he would be nervous about something a trivial as that. Get it together Steve.

 

* * *

 

 

He asks Sam to come over that night. He has red wine, orders Japanese curry rice (because he doesn’t have time to actually learn the recipe without burning his apartment) and some 90’s and 00’s rnb playlist on. By the look on Sam face when he enters, he likes that, immediately starting to sway with the music, closing the door behind him, taking Steve by the hand and dancing a little while asking him about his mission.

The food is delicious, Sam is singing along an Alicia Keys song Steve doesn’t know but he is impress Sam can sing while the wine is still in his hand and not spill anything. He is acting on each sentence as if he was living them, turning, drinking and moving his body near Steve. As the song finishes, he drops the empty glass on the table, pushes Steve slowly against the wall and kisses him.

They smile against each other.

“ _Sam, can I ask you something_?” Steve says nervously.

“ _Yeah, of course_ ”

“ _So, as you know, your my first, umh, boyfriend, because you are a man” he blushes. Sam encourages him to continue. “And on the physical aspect of things, this is great, extra great even, really, this is uh, “da bomb” as the youth says, or something like that_ ”, now Sam is struggling to contain his laughter but nods again. “ _So, umh, I wanted to know if…if you were comfortable with the more uh, penetrative aspect of the sex_ ” he adds quickly.

Sam takes a step back.

“ _Just so we’re on the same page here, you’re talking about fucking right?_ ” Steve makes a high pitched sound, trying his best to control his face. Sam continue “ _Yeah, I am good with that, I just wanted you to be ready because as you said, I am your first man_ , _we don’t have to do anything like that before you want to, if you never want to, it’s fine too I guess_ ”

“ _I want to! It’s just…Who is supposed to…bottom?”_

Sam deadpan before laughing, putting his hand on Steve shoulder.

“ _Oh man, you are killing yourself here, I am versatile, so, it’s anyway you want, really_.”

Steve lets a breath he didn’t know he was holding, a little more confident.

“ _I want to try, both, with you, tonight_ ”

Sam gives him the “ _is that so_?” look but Steve doesn’t flinch, acting like he was ready to fight someone.

“ _Easy there tiger, you can’t just go inside somebody’s booty randomly so here what’s gonna happened. I will go to my place, I’ll be back in half an hour and you’re going to have a piece of that ass. Ok_?”

Steve takes a little more time than necessary to understand why Sam needed to go to his place, he is crimson at that point and nods like a robot, making Sam laugh again and kiss him.

* * *

 

 

He tries to act cool as he goes out but as soon as the door is closed, he rushes to his apartment, heart racing. This isn’t the glamorous part of bottoming but he will be so clean someone could eat in his ass when it’s over, he will NOT disappoint.

He is nervous when he comes back, Steve smiles at him shyly before taking him to the bed. A nice king size with large glass windows on the right. The room isn’t that much personalized, only two painting on the walls and some pictures on the closet.

Steve takes off his shirt and opens the first two buttons of his jeans, just enough to see his pubes but not enough to see the birth of his manhood before going on the bed half lying on it.

The show has already begun, the music still playing in the living room, it gives Sam an idea, maybe this is too much? Maybe he should keep “that” for another time? Maybe he want’s Steve to not be too stressed and this is his way of helping him. He hold a finger up just to indicate that he wants Steve to stay here, goes to the playlist and catches the song he is looking for actually three songs later.

When he is back in the bedroom, Steve is clearly intrigued but as soon as Sam takes of his shirt slowly before tossing it somewhere while his body rolls on the rhythm of “Pony”, Steve can’t find a single reason to complain. Sam approaches him and Steve immediately sit to get closer. His hands are taken to make them open Sam jeans, one button at a time, reveling a red and white mesh shorty underneath. By the time the jeans is near the shirt, Steve his practically salivating looking at the underwear. It allows him to e a little skin thanks to the small holes and the big bulge under looks delicious. He doesn’t know if he should look at Sam face or Sam crotch, he tries to do both, his own boner painful at that point.

Sam stops him when he tries to take off what’s left of his clothes and he grunts until he is pushed further on the bed and Sam starts to straddle him, moving his ass with precision, left cheek, right, cheek, “ _If you’re horny, let’s do it_ ” the song in the living room says. Steve bites his lips, his hands on Sam tights as the man lay over him, kiss his earlobe, his mouth, his collarbone. The way his tights closes and opens to make him back toward the edge of the bed drives Steve nearly crazy. “ _Was Sam a stripper in another life_?” he wonders, until Sam takes him and makes him turn, now laying on his belly. He can feel him finally taking his jeans and boxer off, displaying his own ass at his boyfriend. Well, it wasn’t the way they agreed on but at this point, he agrees to anything, that why he doesn’t protest when Sam makes him on all fours and grinds again his ass in a very suggestive way. Steve is ready to ask Sam to fuck him when the man makes him turn again ( _already?_ ), that time, only with the strength of his own muscles. “ _Wow_ ” lets escape Steve, as Sam makes him understand that he wants him to kneel before him, readying himself for what is coming. Well, he wasn’t exactly "that ready" as the role are now reversed and Sam is moving is back against Steve. First, with his shorty still on, then, quickly, without. Steve hands come to caress the firm globes, moving along the man under him. He knows Sam must do it on purpose, his movement making his dick go from his ball sack to the top of his ass.

From the underwear on the bed, Sam gets a little pack with a condom and a lube dose. At that point, Steve needs all of his self-control to let Sam being the lead. He is teasing him to death and with the way his back his arched, he could almost see his hole. “ _I got to do this_ ” he announces without letting Sam the time to react. His tongue his licking the tight entrance voraciously. The sound Sam makes is between the scream and the moan. He licks and sucks till he feels his hole more relaxed, till his tongue can almost gets in. That’s when Sam loses all control too, turns to put the condom on Steve length, some lube on it and resume his position, guiding him in. “ _Woooowwww_ ” breathes Sam. Steve doesn’t move, Sam goes at his own pace.

“ _Are you ok?”_   Wants to know Steve, concerned.

“ _Yeah, yeah, it’s been a while and you’re not exactly a small size so…umpfh, oh God, Did your dick got bigger too when you became a supersoldier_?”

“ _No, it’s…uh, it was always like that_ ”

_“Damn boy, oh, okay, okay, let me do this_ ”

Sam starts to move again, just a little stronger, making it almost out before going back in. He is in charge and Steve quickly gets with the program. When Sam is more comfortable, Steve takes the lead, pushing the man to lay completely. Wrapping an arm against him. Sam doesn’t know how long Steve is pounding him but tears almost form in his eyes, the pleasure is intense.

“ _I want to see your face when you’re gonna cum with my dick inside you Sam_ ” Steve says, turning him on his back.

“ _Fuck Steve, stop saying things like tha_ t” his skin darker if it’s even possible, still, he asks “ _You like it, you like being in me?_ ”

Steve pounds harder, strokes Sam at the same time, adding just the right amount of saliva to makes Sam shake with pleasure. The way Sam tenses, he can feel his about to come. Without failure, the long, hot squirts hit Sam belly, his neck and even his face. Riding his boyfriend orgasm, Steve fucks him until he feels himself explode in him, hands on his hips.

He gets out slowly, making Sam swear a little. He takes off the condom.

“ _Shower_?” he proposes after their breathing his better.

Sam agrees, reaching for another kiss before getting up.

 

* * *

 

 

Life is good, in Sam’s opinion. He got a terrific job at the VA, more adventure than he could imagine with the Avengers and Steve is by his side. Now, three months in, he was glad he truly felt like the past was in the past and not a shadow lurking, ready to hit him at the first occasion. He was wrong. One of the weird things he didn’t expect was a new side of Bucky Barnes. He saw the rival, the colleague, the friend but recently, something was kind of weird between them, as if Sam offended him or he didn’t like his presence as much as before. At first, he thought that it was because he was too much with Steve, but they didn’t saw each other’s every day, trying to keep an healthy distance, living in the same building as your boyfriend and working with him occasionally. He didn’t know how to approach the topic with him.

It’s Wednesday morning, Sam is at his home, knowing that he wouldn’t be needed before eleven, he dozes off in his bed smiling to himself. Hs phone vibrates, it’s just a text from Bucky, asking him to come by his apartment when he can. He doesn’t say it’s actually urgent or what it is about but if he’s asking him to come, it’s probably because he did something wrong decides Sam getting up. Motivated by the idea of knowing something juicy.

He makes it at Bucky’s some time later, knocking softly. He waits a little when finally, the man opens the door, shirtless and pant hanging low on his hips to the point of Sam seeing the start of his ass when Bucky turns to serve himself a cup of coffee.

“ _Were you busy? I can come back another time if you want_ ” proposes Sam, his eyes on the wall suddenly.

“ _No I’m good, come, did you have breakfast yet?”_

Sam declines, sitting in front of Bucky. He doesn’t have time to question him before a plate with waffles finds its way with some cranberry juice and coffee. He shrugs to himself and eat, praising Bucky for his culinary skills.

“ _They say the way to a man hearts is through is stomach_ ”

“ _I mean, It’s kind of true, that how my sister got married. She wanted a specific man and she tried to make him taste her food three times before he actually agreed and now they are happy with one kid_ ” tells Sam as he finishes his plate.

Bucky is near the fridge, he comes behind Sam and takes the plate, nearly draping himself over the other man doing so. Sam is confused but brush it off as one of Bucky weirdness.

The guy starts to do the dishes and Sam looks at him, look at the pants threatening to drops any minutes now. He frowns, Bucky turns to look at him, smiling a little.

“ _Uh, you don’t seem to have underwear_ ” he comments, unable to stop himself.

Bucky grins and just answer “ _No I don’t_ ” which is weird because, Sam didn’t know Bucky was going commando in the presence of others.

“ _Are you ok Bucky_?” he finally asks after several minutes. Bucky gives him a look Sam can’t decipher. He starts to walk toward Sam until he his right in front of him, practically between his legs. Sam puts his hand on his almost bare hips, stopping him. “ _Whoa, there, what are you doing_?”

“ _Are you happy with Steve_?”

Sam is shocked by the question and the situation, so much, in fact, that his grip on Bucky fades and the man put himself closer, making Sam look at his eyes with a finger under his chin “ _So?_ ”, a second finger brush Sam cheek and it’s like having an electric choc, only, it’s not necessary a pleasure one and more a “red alert” one.

He gets up, pushing Bucky until his back is against the opposite wall.

“ _What the fuck are you doing, are you completely insane?_ ” anger is barely contained in his tone, his hand is on Bucky shoulder, the human one. With a quickness Sam wasn’t ready for, Bucky uses his metal hand to hit his arm, making him slip right on him. Bucky’s arms closes themselves around Sam.

“ _I just want to know Sam, are you happy with Steve? I saw you pinning for him for a long time, maybe he doesn’t deserve you_ ”.

Sam frees himself, two second from kicking Bucky in the face.

“ _I’ll humor you, Barnes, yes I am happy with you best friend. I don’t know what you think you’re doing_ _but think very, very carefully about your next words_ ” he threatens;

“ _What about me instead?”_ asks Bucky and Sam mind is now a windows 95 tying to uses the latest version of Photoshop because he can just gape at Bucky.  “ _What about that, I’ll kiss you once, just so we know the taste. Maybe we won’t even like it, what do you think?”_ he proposes, once again, getting closer.

It’s when he leans to kiss Sam that the man lost it and punches him.

“ _You are the worst Barnes, the worst. How can you do that to Steve? Now I know you truly don’t care about me but he is your fucking brother. I don’t need a taste, I don’t want to be with you, I only want Steve, you fucking had MONTHS to make a move so don’t tell me you had a waking up call today, I don’t believe it. You’re trying to mess with me and I want to know why. Now_ ” spits Sam, ice in his veins.

“ _Calms down S…”_

“ _NOW!_ ” Sam shouts.

Bucky looks at him, face closed.

“ _Steve is in love with you, you don’t know what he was telling me while you weren’t there, how hurt he was about the situation. I needed to be sure you weren’t playing with him, that you wouldn’t go and leave him again or with someone else…_ ”

Something in Sam snap at this very moment, not even registering what Bucky says after. He throws himself at Bucky and they starts to fight. “ _How dare you test me_!”, “ _How can you do that_ ”, “ _I fucking hate you_ ” he screams while dodging and kicking. The coffee machine? At Bucky’s face, The waffle plate? Hitting Sam in the shoulder.

“ _HEY! HEY! WHAT AR YOU DOING?”_ they ears Steve shouts , placing himself between them, Sam arms trying to reach for Bucky still while the man tries his best not losing his pants in the process. “ _STOP THAT NOW!_ ” he orders, his Captain America voice on which has the merit to actually make them stop, breath heavy and murder in their eyes. Well, murder in Sam’s eyes. Bucky seems more annoyed than anything. “ _You two, sit down on the couch, you better have a good explanation for that_ ”

Three minutes later, Sam hadn’t say a thing while Steve tries to convince them to tell him what is going here on this day. Tears starts falling of Sam eyes, of anger, frustration and most of all, incomprehension, he closes them then turns to Bucky.

“ _Fuck you, fuck you, Bucky, I fucking hate you, how can I been so stupid, all this time, I thought we bonded, I thought we were friends, we were just messing with me. Do you know what your best friend did Steve, uh? He invited me this morning and tried to seduce me or whatever…_ ” (At that Steve turns to Bucky who hold his gaze shamelessly) _“…and all that because he wanted to “know if I was going to run with someone else” or I don’t know_.”

“ _Bucky?”_ Steve demands, clearly waiting for what he has to say.

“ _Come on Steve, he lied to us for months, we didn’t even knew he was interested in guy, then he just left you here, once again, for months, I needed to know if he was someone right for you_ ”

“ _You didn’t have to do that, and certainly not like that_ ” Steve says, pain in his voice.

“ _Don’t bullshit me Rogers, you were even angrier that I was about the LMD, I listened to you during a long ass time. I know for a fact that you are in love with him in a way you never was before, if you”re going to give all of you to someone, I’ll have to know if he will break your heart for nothing. I am not sorry, just like he is not sorry using the Interface and just like you’re not sorry for breaking with Sharon and purposely not telling it to Sam because you were fucking afraid of what you were feeling at that time_ ”

They all look at each other, jaw clenched.

_“I refuse to go back to the shithole we were in before, I’m sorry, I can’t do that again, so Steve, take your time thinking about if you trust me enough to be with me and Bucky…I don’t know, do what you want, I clearly don’t know you and you surely don’t know me so I hope you’re happy with what you did_ ” he ends with a shrug, leaving the apartment.

Steve stays here, fire in his eyes, looking at Bucky. The only reason he didn’t stop Sam was because he needed a nice little chat with his best friend, it couldn’t wait

 

* * *

 

 

Steve catches Sam in the gym, sparing with Natasha in the afternoon.

“ _Sam, can I talk to you?”_

Natasha doesn’t stop and Sam catches her foot then block the second one before he hits him. She smiles

“ _Good Wilson, you’re better now, should I go visit James while you talk with your boyfriend?_ ” she proposes.

“ _Nah, I’m good, thank you Nat_ ”

She smiles then passes near Steve murmuring only to him “ _I still going to see him_ ” before leaving. Considering how the conversation went with Bucky, Nat throwing herself in the mix is probably gonna be overkill.

Sam puts a towel on himself and drink some water.

“ _Sam, I love you_ ”, Steve says dead serious making the other man stops, close his eyes and asks in return.

“ _You’re still upset about what I did_ ” it’s not a question.

“ _I am, because I almost lost you without having a chance to be with you. What Bucky said is kind of true, you know? With you…I can’t do things half baked. It’s like I want to give you all of me and I was scared about it. What he did get wrong however is the fact that I am ready to take the risk of being hurt in the end. I don’t even want to think about a point where we are not together. He shouldn’t have done that. I am sorry_ ”

“ _I don’t know what to say Steve, I thought your feelings were kind of new, I believed leaving was the best options for everyone because I didn't know you felt like that at that moment and I was wrong, that’s why I came back. I understand him being protective of you, I truly do, but I don’t know if I can be around him knowing that it was only to test me. I love you too, I’ll deal with it. I don’t want to come between you so I’ll back off if that’s what you need_ ”

Steve gets closer, taking a little reluctant Sam (because of the sweat) in his arm.

“ _What I need is for you to come with me and show me again how much you love me_ ” he tries, a little flirty but most of all, why an apprehension on Sam’s reaction. A way of asking if they are good.

Sam kisses him before going to the shower, Steve on his tail.

 

* * *

 

Sam wakes up from a intense dream that night. He almost immediately forget it. He feels Steve arms around him, gives him a quick peck which makes him do a soft sound and goes back to sleep. No dream can compete with his reality.

 End 

 


End file.
